Welcome to the anal cancer forum although I’m sorry you find yourself here.
Your husbands situation is incredibly sad, I hate what this disease is doing to him, you and your family. It's such a cruel disease and yes, many cancer patients do look and feel well which is another cruel twist.
I think the public have a perception that all cancer patients look ill, loose their hair and have their head down a toilet 24/7. However, the reality is very different and this is something I personally have learnt during my own cancer journey. At my hospital, I often haven’t a clue who is/isn’t a patient. I’m also often surprised when I meet stage 4 cancer patients who look incredibly healthy.
I sympathise and can only imagine how this makes an already incredibly hard situation even more challenging to live and cope with.
You have done the right thing by coming to Macmillan as there is lots of support for you. You have joined the anal cancer forum however, I would recommend you consider joining three other groups:
In terms of other support for yourself, please call the Macmillan helpline. The tel no. is at the bottom on this message. You can speak with nurses who can provide you with support and advise on how to cope with your situation.
In the meantime, I hope that regardless of what is going on inside your husband, that he remains feeling well so you can enjoy living life as normal and do things together.
Don’t let this disease ruin the time that you have left together.
I see your post is from a little while ago so maybe you’ve had some answers to your question since then. My mum was similar but sadly offered no treatment. She looked and I assume felt healthy until She went to the gp in March with what she thought was haemorrhoids. In June she had a biopsy and in July she was diagnosed with anal cancer and the scans shown up that it had spread to the liver and lung - it was at this time consultants told us she was a lot more ill than she looked. She seemed to deteriorate quickly after this, almost with every piece of bad news she got worse. She only ever really had pain in her bum from the Tumor and the biopsy but managed on just paracetamol and a small amount of oral morphine. She was given weeks to live on the 7th August and passed away the 22nd September.
I hope the Chemo is helping your husband and that you are able to cherish much more time together,
