Positive Polly 3.0

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Hope you are all OK. I've been checking in with most of the posts on here but do avoid reading some of them because I sometimes they make me a little anxious and therefore don't always reply. I hope that in the future when all this seems a distant memory I can offer the same support as some of the other people on here have been able to for me.

This week has been a roller coaster. It's been my first full week of treatment. I had IV chemo last Wednesday and now have launched on the radiotherapy and chemo tablets regime. To say its been a roller coaster is an understatement. Monday and Tuesday this week I was in pain to the point where walking was difficult and today I feel almost normal. feeling like this is unnerving. It's almost like the side effects remind me that it is working and when I don't get any I get worried that somehow its not doing its thing.

I'm interested to note if anyone else had that experience? Lots of side effects one day and nothing the next? I'm trying to just be grateful for the days I'm feeling well.

Lots of positives this week.

The team at the Chrisitie are amazing. They listen to you and respond quickly if you feel unwell. 

I keep receiving little Happy Post packages through the mail from my.friends who are thinking of me.

I'm enjoying my home and my Christmas trees on the days I need to stay at home.

Hope everyone else has got some little positives too.

Lots of love and thanks to everyone here for all of their support and guidance.  

Xx

  • Good morning Feather it’s great that you have got through your first week and before you know it you are at the end of your second week. I fully understand your point regarding reading through experiences from members on here and can remember feeling frightened to death of all these symptoms and side effects. My oncologist also did this long list of side effects I could possibly experience on my first appointment and I was petrified. One thing I was told was we don’t get all of them! If you get side effects they are usually gradual as the weeks pass. I kind of resented reading these experiences at first but realised they are important and members need this space to express reality that happened to them. As the lovely Nicola told me, those that don’t experience harsh symptoms would not probably feel the need to come on here. I suppose we cannot sugar coat cancer treatment. Where I eventually needed morphine for pain there were some that managed on alternating ibuprofen and paracetamol. It can be harsh but short and you do have good or bad days for a while. Even after all my treatment and months down the line you can still suddenly feel a pain that starts the worrisome cycle of fear and most were just unfounded and just post treatment niggles. Best to make sure though by keeping your team informed of any changes. Don’t forget that our imagination has a part to play in this but not to say we are making it up but stress has a lot to answer for. Great you are happy with your medical team and that’s a massive bonus!  Glad you are getting lots of support from people around you and before you know it it will be over. 
    Julie

  • Feather 653

    It is lovely to hear from you.  And please don't worry about not engaging with some of the posts, I think we all understand that at any given point we would rather not be aware of the potential pitfalls.  In the early days I couldn't even answer the phone when the hospital rang, I wanted to bury myself in a little nest and not hear or see anything, I was in complete denial.

    I didn't have fluctuations in how I felt during treatment, so don't worry about the chemo/radiotherapy not doing its job.  What I did have was a strong reaction to my first dose of chemo (I had six months of systemic chemo first) and the second lot was cancelled until my liver levels recovered.  Thereafter I only had 75% of the dose, but my oncologist was totally unconcerned about it and said the body can sometimes have a knee jerk reaction, so perhaps that has happened to you.

    But I am full of admiration in how you are counting the positives!  Keeping that attitude will help see you through this and of course we are always here should you need support.

    Irene xx

  • Hi Feather,

    There's no need to feel you have to weigh in on each one! Folks are probably pretty tired of how often I do!  Smiley

    First week down and you are off and running! There were certainly ups and downs in my progress but nothing major. 

    It's interesting to gp back through my journals for that time period. In my head it's most wailing and hand-wringing, but when I read them, I held up better than I'd have thought possible and certainly better than I remember.

    What a lovely thing, to get little Happy Posts from friends and supporters!

    Keep powering through.

    Hugs

    Suz