Scared

  • 12 replies
  • 37 subscribers
  • 949 views

Hi all 

I thought I had piles but had a digital rectal exam at hospital and was told the consultant was very worried (her words) that is does look like a form of cancer - possible skin cancer and my treatment options maybe surgery or chemo/ radiation etc

I have a lot of lump all inside the anus which I can feel inside  

I am now waiting for X-ray scans and colonoscopy- I’m so scared that it might be melanoma as she she said the word skin - when google this it’s sounds like the worst - I can’t wait or sleep - have 2mg diazpiam and taking 3 a day but feel like I just wanna cry in bed all day 

not sure if I should call hospital tomorrow and ask what type they think it is as I want to know but then if they say melanoma type my anxiety would be uncontrollable 

im 44 male HIV positive (controlled) and have had genital warts in the past 

  • Thanks you for taking the time to respond mean a lot - I’m so pleased you went from stage 4 to undetectable - that’s Amazing 

  • Unknown

    The first few weeks are utterly terrifying.  We all remember exactly when our world came crashing down with the words 'cancer' and the whirlwind of appointments that follows.  It does get better, I promise you.  Once your team treating you have all the results in and devise a treatment plan tailored for you, you will feel a lot more in control.  It is just the waiting around that is unbearable.  I agree with the others, don't consult with Doctor Google, definitely not good for the mental health and much of the information is out-of-date in any case.

    We have lots of coping strategies during treatment, so please come back and let us know when your treatment starts.  Or if you just need support in the meantime, virtually everyone on here has been through what you are experiencing right now and there is always a friendly listening ear.

    You won't go through this alone, Unknown.

    Irene xx