So I have an appointment today with my oncologist and also a planning scan, I’m hoping I get a date to start my treatment as I feel things are getting worse now.
my pain is manageable at times but not at others , going to the toilet is horrendous and very painful.
the ‘wound/open sore ‘ on the cheek of my bottom has definitely got bigger and this is where a lot of the pain is from as it rubs on my clothes , impossible to put any sort of dressing on to try and
top this because of how near my bottom it is . I can’t sit still or in the same position for long and even walking is painful
after being so upbeat about everything and not showing how I’m feeling I think I’m now ready to admit IM SCARED.
scared of how the treatment will effect me , scared of side effects, scared it won’t work .
after seeing how radiotherapy affected my brothers neck with the skin literally falling off I’m very scared as I literally have no skin on the cheek of my bottom so how’s it going to affect me .
Hi Poohbear,
I know it probably won’t be of much comfort right now but the worries, concerns & emotions you have going on right now are natural, I remember feeling the exact same way, I desperately wanted treatment to start because I knew this was my best chance of a healthy future but I was also dreading the side effects of the treatment as I’d read some horror stories! I relaxed a little once my treatment began & I realised that these side effects were different for everyone & didn’t all happen at once. You’ll obviously be seeing your radiotherapy team each day Monday through Friday & they can request any medication that they think you may need including pain relief & creams etc., you should also have access to a nurse that can do the same & you should be seeing your oncologist on a weekly basis for bloods, skin checks & general well-being assessments so please don’t try & be brave, now isn’t the time, make them aware of anything you need. If you’ve not already been to see your oncologist yet make him aware today of how much discomfort you’re in right now & hopefully he can offer you something that will give you some relief. I hope your appointment & planning scan goes well. Let us know how you get on.
Nicola
I hope this has reassured you a bit Poohbear & great that you have a start date too. I took part in a clinical trial myself also (PLATO), I was followed up for 3 years by then they had all the information they needed from me. I was of the mind that if it helped someone else going through the same diagnosis in the future then I was happy to take part.
Nicola
