Have a mum with fully treatable advanced bowel cancer who has bpd..and high anxiety.....only child...live together with mum and hubby, very ( thought it was) close relationship......given up career to care for her and am doing everything possible to please......including 24 hour help from me.
So.......she has huge meltdowns with me over some ridiculous thing....out comes...blame, anger, insults, bitterness, vile comments , proper angry episodes, in which I am suddenly the enemy. drama....we get classic splitting between me and my husband......and I have absolutely no life of my own.....and if I try, I'm selfish......and the topping on the lot.....when I try and defend myself....how can you treat me like this when I have cancer!!!
Sitting here middle of night feeling sick to the pit of my stomach about everything.......she wants out......but she has threatened just about every kind of revenge on me....financially....taking my house...friends......and then I'm left with the horror of her cancer diagnosis and all the guilt.
She needs serious mental help.....and it just isn't there, despite trying just about everything you could including local mental health team......no help.......only god help me get through this.....this emotional pain is unbearable......sorry for the cry for help!!
Update: Had a good sit-down and cleared the air...I hope it lasts, and it's made us both realise the terrible damage and strain that cancer can cause!!! Moving on, hope we can both get some solid help to get through this. Thankyou so much for all your support....you are all keeping me going.
