My dad is only 72 and has had vascular dementia which was diagnosed about 2 years ago. This diagnosis in itself has been a challenge. Over the last 6 weeks my dad has gone from being fairly mobile at home to being bed maintained. He went into hospital last week due to a UTI that wasn’t clearing and within 6 hours at the hospital we received the devastating news that he has cancer. They think it started in his lungs but has now spread to his lymph nodes, stomach and bones throughout his body. They can’t treat him and he is now receiving palliative care in hospital. We can’t get him home because they can’t provide the level of nursing care he needs at home. I am devastated and feel like I am going through anticipatory grief. I have 2 children, and my baby girls 1st birthday is in less than 3 weeks. I feel like I can’t think ahead to anything because I am ridden with guilt that my wee dad might not be here. He has a morphine pump in place now. I just don’t know what to expect next and my heart aches. Thanks for taking the time to read this x
Hi Melava
Welcome to our community, I hope you find it both informative and supportive.
Sorry to hear about your dad, I hope the hospital is as comfortable as might be possible, I know how difficult it can be when you have young children and a parent in hospital and know how difficult it can be to balance your time. When my son was born my mum was in hospital and that was over 100 miles away too!
There was a really good article on here on anticipatory grief that might be helpful. How old is your other child, I wonder if talking to children might be useful. Our son was about 6 when my wife was diagnosed, though we were lucky in that my wife had two rounds of chemo and they managed to make her cancer stable.
<<hugs>>
Steve
