Hi Everyone
I would be grateful for any advice and support you can give me. I live in another county from my niece who is very ill at the moment. She has had lots of chemo, which has made her feel very ill, with her second course she suffered anaphylactic shock and was near death, but she has been so determined and kept going with all the treatment suggested to her.. We have not seen each other for many years but have been messaging since Christmas when she was told her cervical cancer of four years ago had metastasised to her lungs and was incurable. I try to support her as best I can and am here for her any time she wants to talk, I will visit her if she decides that is the right thing but the situation is difficult due to estrangement from her mother (my sister). She has just found out that the last chemo was again unsuccessful and the doctor is looking into radiotherapy - but this may not be possible. Lymph nodes near the heart have been affected. She seems reluctant to contact Macmillan for what I guess is palliative support, I have suggested this a couple of times but she seem to be reluctant. I think she needs this support as to me her illness seems to be reaching a critical stage. I just want her to get the best care and support she can. She has a husband and family but i just don't know what to say to help her. I don't know if her consultant has been clear about prognosis, or if she just does not want to talk about this. Any advice would be appreciated. Martha Jane
Hi Martha Jane this sounds like a very difficult situation for you and I am sorry to hear your niece is so ill. My suggestion, though to be fair as don't have any direct experience of this situation, would be to continue to be there for your niece, to listen, to be someone she can talk to and to make gentle suggestions, but I think you might be best to take a steer from her on what she does and doesn't want to discuss. She is lucky to have such a caring Aunt and just being there for her, in whatever way she needs you, I am sure she will appreciate. Best wishes
