A few days ago we found out that my husbands daughter now has secondary cancer. It has spread to all of her organs. I'd really like help on how to support my husband. He is shutting himself away and his daughter is saying she doesn't feel well enough to see him.
Dear Kellyb
what a sad time for your husband and for all of you.
In my experience with my husband when he first got his diagnosis which was that he was now in the last months of his life, possibly weeks. He didn’t want to see anyone.
now he’s allowing visitors every other day for short visits.
your husbands daughter might be in that kind of phase as she processes her shock and of course manages her symptoms.
I suppose all you can do is listen to your OH when he’s ready to speak about his feelings or even just to speak.
I’ve taken on a new approach to everyone and everything in our lives since the diagnosis.
I just sit back and do my own thing until someone wants something from me. Once I stopped offering help, support, things, tea, coffee and food. It all calmed down and people came to me. 
and I’ve even read a book in the last two weeks.
so I’m short get on with exactly want you want to do and others will ask when they need it.
best Wishes
M
