Mum finding it hard to accept

Hello safron, u might find it useful to join the Family and friends group, as well as the ones u already have. You will then b able to get support for yourself.

It's sad your mum can't accept her diagnosis, but maybe it's her way of dealing with it? Makes it hard for the rest of the family tho, doesn't it?

I think you'll find ppl in the Pancreatic cancer group may well have answers to some of your questions.

I'm just an ordinary member passing through, as it were. I'd have directed you to the groups but you've already done that. How about putting something more  in your profile - rather like your post- so ppl know where you're coming from

Thanks so much for your advice. I will definitely join that group and update my profile. 

It does make it hard for the family you are right, it’s frustrating because I want to help her accept it but I feel it’s only her that can do that by herself 

thabis agaib for your help x

Hi Safron, my heart goes out to you all.  

I was given my pancreatic cancer diagnosis last summer, I am 66.  Initially cancer in the tail, then told need bigger op, then after op nothing done as it had spread outside, it has now gone to my liver.  I am on palliative chemo.  My first course of chemo ended Jan '19 then after only a 3 week break I was put on Folfirinox and the tumour in my pancreas is shrinking.

The point of my telling you the above is that last summer I guess I went into shock, I was numb,  I thought I'd only live 6 months at the most.  (The hardest part was telling my daughter as she lost her younger brother to cancer when she was 8.) 

You sound like a wonderful loving, caring daughter and although you are finding your mum's refusal to accept she has cancer hard I think  it is her body's way of coping with the shock.  Once she does accept it, and I believe she will when she is ready, the best you can do is what you already do and that is love her, hold her tight and always remember when she is angry and confused it's the cancer she really wants to punish.  Please don't be brave for your mum's sake, (I'd be a millionaire if I had shares in a tissue company).

Don't forget Macmillan are there for all of you even if it's just a chat.

Lesley