How to help my Dad with his extreme anxiety at night?

Hi Spalmon, your dad's diagnosis is only three weeks ago and therefore high anxiety especially at night when there's no distractions would in my view be expected. However in regards to the anxiety medication I would seek a second opinion. Your father has been dealt a major blow in terms of his health both physically from the cancer and of course mentally, it is not the Dr. Who has been dealt this blow. He may need something short term to help him cope or longer term. We all deal with anxiety in different ways myself through exercise, others through talking voicing our fears and feeling listened to, focused breathing, listening to music, medication .... your fathers dr should be able to advise if unwilling to provide some form of medication. The only thing I can suggest for tonight is maybe put some music on low for your father to listen to it may act as a distraction and help him relax and calm him. I would also speak to you fathers dr or father's Macmillan nurse if he has one in regards to getting his nausea and pain under control as this is ultimately going to cause your father not only great discomfort but anxiety. Our Macmillan nurse was so helpful in regards to getting my husbands pain and feeling of nausea under control and can be a good source of support for the whole family. I do hope things improve for you all soon, take care.

Hi Spalmon,

I’m so sorry to hear about your situation. I can only speak from my experience with my Mum (terminal liver cancer) but there are definitely meds out there that can help a lot with the nausea and anxiety. Is his cancer being treated by a hospital unit or is he terminal and discharged for palliative care at home? You might need to push harder to find someone in the NHS system who will understand his needs better, my Mum was prescribed a whole bunch of meds by her hospital team and now she’s come home to die we have a ‘just in case’ box alongside her regular meds which can deal with these kinds of problems. Macmillan and hospices generally are a great resource as their nurses know a lot about cancer and how to treat it/where to get help so you can also give them a call.

hope that helps,

Rachel

Dear Rachel

thank you for your message - the district nurses came out yesterday and we have some new meds to try.

thanks so much xx

Thanks so much for taking the time to reply , we have some new meds to try xx

Like others, I would recommend getting a second opinion from a different doctor. My mother went to see a phychiatrist and was prescribed medicines to help with the anxiety. Those helped some. She also took CBD oil with a THC component which worked really well but I don't know about the legalities or availability of that in your country. (I'm in the U.S. where it is legal in some states.)

Best wishes