Worried it might come back

Hello Ma78 

My thoughts are with you here. It's a very hard one this and we all react to a cancer diagnosis with a different degree of worry. As a parent you have no control over either the treatment plan or how your child (even though he's 50) will accept and react to the treatment.

From reading your post and a little bit on your son's profile it looks like his team have been very pro-active with the spread and have managed a complete cure. At this point I fully understand your worry but at the same time you need to trust his team and the fact they have given him the best possible treatment they can.

I would be very thankful that he's come through a cancer diagnosis and has the rest of his life to look forward to - a positive attitude and the correct state of mind and you can move forward - I should know, i am 33 months into a 36 month journey and from diagnosis to now, yes It's been tough and even though I am 69 I always now look forward to the future.

Think positive - he will be fine - the future is the way to go, don't look back.

Best wishes - Brian.

Hi Ma78,

Very glad to hear that your son has come through all his treatment and is now well, but I know exactly where you're coming from.

My daughter was diagnosed in June 2023 with a very rare and aggressive cancer. She had eight cycles of two different chemos, one of which affected her heart; two cancer surgeries and a heart operation; followed by 15 sessions of radiotherapy. She is now nine cycles in to a further 14 chemos, due to finish in January 2025.

I thought I was really looking forward to the end of her treatment but I'm just beginning to realise how scary I will find it - no regular oncology appointments and chats with the CNS nurse, no treatments which you feel are fighting the disease. It feels like the safety net will be taken away.

You're right, worrying doesn't help - but it's what we, as mum's, do. I hope it will get easier over time.  Sending love and strength, and best wishes for your son's continued good health.

My God what an ordeal! I am so sorry for what you must both be going through. My son will get 6 monthly scans to catch it early if it does come back. I think this is normal for all cancer patients so I expect your daughter will get these too. They go on for 5 years. It's possible the NHS will have changed it's policies by then, and do the scans for longer. If not, we have decided that once the NHS won't do any more we shall go private. What type of cancer did your daughter have? How old is she?My son's was thymoma which is also very rare, and his was also aggressive. We just have to hope it won't come back, as you and your daughter do, but it's still a worry isn't it.

Daughter's cancer is a very rare (less than 1%) type of breast cancer. A bladder tumour was also found through the staging.

Daughter has been told that her follow up will be regular mammograms. As her cancer was not detected on a mammogram, only with an MRI, she doesn't feel that will be very helpful and has already decided to pay privately for an annual MRI.

Wouldn't want you to think I'm complaining about the NHS. Her treatment has been excellent and we've both had great support. I hope you and your son have had the same experience.

I'd feel the same about the mammograms being less suitable for the breast. The more so if there's a tumour in her bladder as well. The NHS have treated us well, we are both very grateful, but everyone is human. Even doctors make mistakes. It is especially difficult for them where the cancer is a rare one and there is less experience out there of how to treat them. Personally, I'd be inclined to ask for a second opinion re the follow up mammograms. Plus do the private scans anyway. Life is so very precious it's worth it if you/she possibly can. All the best to you both.