My mum was taken into hospital for a hernia surgery in March. On scan for that area they found bone cancer and spots on the liver. On further scans they fund it it has spread to her lower ribs, lung, and shoulders and pelvic area. They done a liver biopsy which couldn't determine the stage of the cancer. It's very confusing. 1 year ago mum had breast cancer after having a mascetamoy got the all clear in December. After a near 5 weeks in hospital because mum had a funny turn which lasted 4 days much like a stoke, no mobility no strength, speech went funny and hallucinating and slept a lot. They found calcium masses on her skull! They gave mum a shot of something to keep them under control. Which last scan has shown that it has helped. And that the cancer hasn't spread any further. 5 weeks later mum is home. Mobility low but moving sleeping a lot eating enough to keep a sparrow alive. Yet refused carers to help. Us sisters are doing what we can but are struggling. As our family lives are being pulled too. Don't get me wrong we want to help but we live miles apart. The part I'm struggling with is that the time frame of 6-8 with no treatment , possible treatment available but not for another two weeks which could extend life by 6 months. Which is fast approaching. I don't believe her body is strong enough and how much she'll be able to handle if this goes ahead. But since leaving the hospital on Thursday we've been kind of left in limbo... OT palliative pain management just don't seem to be there. Not knowing who is talk to or turn to for help in someway. I just don't know what to say or do for the best. It's been an exhausting 6 weeks for us all including Mum.
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Hi NJ1978 and a warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but so sorry to hear about your mum’s diagnosis.
A cancer diagnosis in the family like this can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' support challenges can help you a lot……. I have a completely different type of cancer and treatment journey.
The Community is actually divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) and when it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your mum and indeed yourself and the ready of the family you may benefit from joining and posting in our……
Supporting someone with incurable cancer
……. support groups where you will connect with a wide range of members navigating the exact same support challenges.
To connect with a group click on the “Bold Italic Links” I have created above …… then once the group page opens click in the [Black - Click to Join - Banner] that appears at the bottom of the page and this will then confirm that you have joined the group.
When you are ready……. you can introduce yourself by putting up your very own post by clicking [+ Create new post] or [+] in the top right of the group page.
You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.
The Macmillan Support Line is open between 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00…… this service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow 3 working days for a reply.
Talking to people ‘face to face’ can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.
