Hi all,
Sorry I'm new here so hopefully okay to post in here!
My grandmother was diagnosed with an aggressive form of breast cancer almost 4 years ago, unfortunately this moved to the bone etc.
She decided herself to decline all treatment apart from surgery, she won't even take any oral medication.
I'm just struggling at the moment to deal with her decisions as she has been getting quite poorly in hospital etc, she is having tests done but has refused to hear the results and that's fine as it's her choice but my grandfather really isn't dealing with any of it well (he doesn't agree with treatment either).
I'm just wondering does anyone have any tips on how to cope? (I know that's a really general question) I'm really struggling to support my mum with it at the moment and everyday it feels there is something new and as my family aren't dealing well and won't get help it's putting the pressure onto us and I just don't know how to function with it anymore and am struggling at work and home etc. I don't agree with all of the decisions that have been made and I just don't know what to say or do anymore. I feel like saying that I don't want to hear anymore about tests etc if my grandmother doesn't either but I don't want to be unfair.
Thanks in advance 
Hi zo95ar1 and a warm welcome to the Macmillan Community but so sorry to hear about your grandmother’s diagnosis and the challenges this is bringing.
A cancer diagnosis in the family like this can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' support challenges can help you a lot……. I have a completely different type of cancer and treatment journey.
This New to Community area is like our reception desk where we try to direct you to the best part of the Community for you to get support.
The Community is actually divided into dedicated Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) and when it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting your grandmother and indeed yourself and the rest of the family you may benefit from joining and posting in our……
Carers only (if you are her caregiver)
Supporting someone with incurable cancer
……. support groups where you will connect with a wide range of members navigating the exact same support challenges.
To connect with a group click on the “Bold Italic Links” I have created above …… then once the group page opens click in the [Black - Click to Join - Banner] that appears at the bottom of the page and this will then confirm that you have joined the group.
When you are ready……. you can introduce yourself by putting up your very own post by clicking [+ Create new post] or [+] in the top right of the group page.
You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
It is an emotional time supporting family so you might find this Macmillan information your feelings when someone has cancer helpful as well as this link getting help with your emotions.
The Macmillan Support Line is open between 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00…… this service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
Talking to people ‘face to face’ can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community ((hugs))
