Hi,
I am new to this, and in short, I don't know what I need or aim to get from this, but here goes
My Dad was diagnosed with Prostate Cancer many years ago (my parents chose not to tell me and my siblings) In the early part of this year, they finally told us, as it had spread much further and has become terminal.
Since telling us, its like his body has just given up and the decline has been rapid and incredibly scary. My dad has always been my super hero and seeing him now, is a hard reality to swallow. I am trying so hard to be what he and my mum need me to be, and they tend to rely on me and my husband more than my siblings when they need anything, which in itself has been difficult.
I have accepted that this is happening, and it is what it is, I think, but a couple of months ago, my dad told me he had around 6mnths to a year left (I don't think he has told my siblings this) I am not sure if I am coping with this, my husband is of the opinion that I haven't really processed what's going on, I am petrified of what is happening, resentful of my parents for not telling us, and of my siblings for their what feels like a non-challant attitude towards it, as I don't feel like they are asked as much of, as me and my husband are. I don't feel like I can break or cry or be upset, and to top it all off, it makes me feel guilty to feel all of these things, when I'm not the one dealing with the cancer. In short I'm anxious, depressed and feel incredibly alone!
Hi One_Off and welcome to the Macmillan Community but so sorry to hear about your dad!s diagnosis and prognosis.
A cancer diagnosis like this in the family can be such a challenging and stressful time but getting support from others who are dealing with the ‘exact same' support challenges can help a lot….. and helps you to feel less alone.
The Community is actually divided into Support Groups (Discussion Rooms) and when it comes to the practical and emotional challenges of supporting family and friends you may benefit from joining and posting in our Carers only and Supporting someone with incurable cancer (that I do see you have connected with) support groups where you will connect with others navigating the exact same support challenges.
To connect with a group click on the “” I have created above then once the group page opens click on “Click to Join” when the black banner appears or “Join” under “Group Tools” (this all depends on the device you are using)
You can then put up your own post when you’re ready by clicking “+new” or “+” in the top right next to the group title. You can copy and paste the text from this post into your new post.
It’s a challenging time for you so you may want to use the Macmillan Support Line is open 8am-8pm (timings may differ across services) 7 days a week on 0808 808 00 00 or via Webchat and Email too. This service provides cancer information, practical information, emotional support, benefits/financial guidance or just a listening ear.
We also have our Ask an Expert section but do allow a few working days for a reply.
Talking to people face to face can be very helpful so do check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area, do also check for a local Maggie's Centre as these folks are amazing.
Do get back to me if you need further help navigating the community.
