My parents split up around 2 years ago but it’s only been the past year my dad has come to terms with it, the communication between my parents has become terrible and as a child I want both of them to be happy. I support my mum in her new relationship and was focusing on rebuilding a strong relationship with my dad. But since his diagnosis of bowel cancer (spread all over, 2months - 1 year to live) all my dad needs is his family. My mum wants to be there but since my dad has been told about my mums new boyfriend (before the diagnosis), my dad has a lot of resentment to my mum (completely understandable) however my mum is the only person in the world my dad can truely be con fort able around.
My dad has now blocked my mum on all forms of communication and his mental health is crashing. He doesn’t want his kids to see him weak and vulnerable but we are all he has now. He’s so weak and needs help getting out the bath but he’s pride won’t let his kids help me. I’m trying my best to keep his stress low and respect his wishes but I don’t know what to do anymore. He has a lot of resentment and doesn’t understand that sometimes people need to go recharge their own batteries I n order to truly be there for him. I’ve been working all weekend and he’s upset at me for not calling until today, truth be told I just needed some time alone to digest and collect more strength but I feel awful. My dad is more upset about my mum and her new partner than he is about the cancer. And I don’t know how to help him 
Hi and welcome to the online community
I'm sorry to read that your dad's cancer diagnosis and I know what a difficult time this will be for you all.
As the online community is divided up into different support groups can I recommend that you join the family and friends group which is a safe and supportive place to share your feelings with others who know what it's like to have a family member living with cancer.
To join just click on the link I've created and then choose 'click to join' or 'join' (depending on the device you're using) on the page that opens. You can then introduce yourself and post in the same way as you did here and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'. To save you typing all this out again you could copy and paste it into the new post.
It would be great if you could pop something about your dad's diagnosis and treatment into your profile as it really helps others when answering or looking for someone with a similar pathway. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.
If you have any difficulty navigating the community just drop me a reply and I'll be pleased to help.
x
"Never regret a day in your life, good days give you happiness, bad days give you experience"
