Morning Luppe, So sorry to hear about how you were treated by your consultant, I was once asked if i had a DNR but the doctor told me it was just a routine question and nothing else, just so no mistakes could happen if i was unable to answer at any time, and she was very nice about it. A consultant can put it in your notes, as you say, but they must talk to you first and can only apply it if you are dying or seriously ill with little time and no chance of getting better. Though as cancer is a disability, if you are unable to speak your yourself, under a disability act they must get consent from your next of kin or family first. take care
Good to see you have done all the right things, i can understand them asking the question, but there is a nice unthreatening way to do it. Though for those who choose DNR it should be on their notes anyway, so they don't have to ask .
A similar thing happened to me when I was in hospital. A doctor came in several times badgering me about having one. At the time I was very weak and full of drugs and ended up consenting, but when my surgeons' registrar came round and saw it in the ward book, she came in and begged me to remove it. I was scheduled for further procedures and she told me that if anything happened to me on the table, they wouldn't be able to do anything to revive me and their hands would be tied.
I removed it and although I was later sent home with palliative care and expected the end to follow, I didn't die and am still here 3 years later. I never have had the DNR re-instated and I tore up the respect form, even though they kept on about having that as well. I will re-visit this when I think it appropriate, but I think that some of these doctors are way too keen to sign you up and, having read it, I'm still not that happy with the wording. But eventually it's something we all have to decide for ourselves. All the best, Rainie x
Hi Raine, that's shocking, they should not be allowed to behave like that, but how lucky for you the surgeon registrar was there I agree the wording is can be an issue but i have a good GP, who has also done a ResPECT form for herself, to help me with the big words. Can i ask have you seen that doctor since that day.
Hi, No, I've never seen him since. I got the impression that he was going round to see patients in dire straits and that this was his role in the hospital. Maybe he was part of a team who did this. I have since had a talk with my GP, who although local has special cancer experience and looks after me. He respected my position and said he'd help me do the form whenever I decided. So that's where I am at the moment. Glad you are happy with what you sorted for yourself. That's what matters. Take care, Rainie x
I asked for a DNR when l was in hospital about 18 months ago. I didn’t need to fill in any forms but l had to sign it. I think two doctors countersigned. I was asked if l wanted to discuss it several times and l refused because my mind is made up. When my heart stops beating, it’s time to go. Your oncologist should have been able to tell you where to get a form from and so should your GP. I would just phone GP and say you are coming to collect the form.
I think the manner in which you were asked was not sympathetic or compassionate. I have a DNR in place but l don’t think medics would attempt to resuscitate a terminally ill patient with or without a DNR. On the other hand, if an otherwise healthy person has an event that leads to a cardiac arrest then of course resuscitation is paramount. lt is a matter of choice.
