Living with incurable cancer, my thoughts only

12 replies
21 subscribers
1466 views

I have had a few days reflecting on certain things, within my life.

Stage 4 incurable cancer, and if i get to March 16th will be seven years, since i heard those dreaded words.

That is what i have been reflecting on, in one way and does sound terrible, i cannot say i am glad, but on reflection, it for me has a slight positive feel.

It gives you a chance to put things into place, my funeral is booked, my will is in order and so on.

Started to sort out things with in the home. little bit at a time.

I had no thought on writing this, till gone 6pm tonight and it came to me. given the choice, i would rather have had this diagnosis, than just one day, without warning, my time was up.

I can not think how my family would have coped with that, and what a shock for them,

Yes slowly, they know that the situation can change at any time, so in one way, i am slowly preparing them, i do not relish what might be, but have no choice, it is a fight we are all on, and for me one day that fight will end.

My own thoughts, and they are my thoughts, i would rather it this way, than suddenly i am gone, and leave my family devastated.

Yes i know i am on borrowerd time so try and make the most of it, every day is a bonus.

Moi2 over 1 year ago

Yes Ellie I understand , I feel the same everything in place, I have my urn and we have bought our family cremation plot. Like you I'm on borrowed time but I look at it as a warning, II might get hit by a bus tomorrow, then I'd have cheated the cancer xx

Moi

Morton68 over 1 year ago

A very important thought to share Ellie. I agree in many ways, although it’s only less than a year for me I have now so many things in place that I previously ignored. Thank you for sharing your thoughts.

M x

sistermoon over 1 year ago

Hi ellie 73

I agree and feel the same, a little time to sort things in preparation. Don't get me wrong, I would have preferred to carry on with my life. But I think of it as my body has sent me a sign, that I couldn't carry on at that pace and level of stress. I now live for today and don't look any further ahead than next week.

I understand.

A x

What is a Community Champion?

I am a Macmillan volunteer.

Macmillan Support Helpline

0808 808 00 00

7 days a week between 8am -8pm

Shadders over 1 year ago

Yes Ellie I totally understand that. I am earlier in my diagnosis and haven’t sorted those things yet but I’ve been thinking a lot about it all. Which I wouldn’t have had chance to do if I got run over by a bus to use to use Moi’s example. Been thinking about what sort of funeral etc, have already sorted will anyway so don’t need to think about that. It is a positive, you’re right and it’s good to think of it that way.
Jac x

ellie 73 over 1 year ago in reply to Shadders

Thank you every one, was my thoughts, though glad in one way i was not alone xx

Fitzeagle over 1 year ago

I feel similarly.

I've started sorting my personal things out and getting the legal stuff done.

And I feel I have more control this way.

Vivien

Moi2 over 1 year ago in reply to ellie 73

Thanks Ellie your post got people thinking and sharing there thoughts with us as I no my family and probably a lot of others don't like to talk about those end of life things xx

Moi

Lucy Locket over 1 year ago

Thank you for this thread Ellie73. I hadn't thought about this.

ellie 73 over 1 year ago in reply to Lucy Locket

Was not sure on the thread, though where my thoughts, when drying my dishes and had to put pen to paper, as you say. xxx

ellie 73 over 1 year ago in reply to Moi2

TX Moi was not sure about posting.

I have already told my kids, when i say enough is enough, that is my decision and please respect it.