Fear

Morning Bev will lookk forward to having a chat later. Hope you have a good morning. xx

I am in the same situation as you. I have been told by my doctors that they can do nothing for me except some palliative radiotherapy. When you hear about all the amazing things modern medicine can do, it seems impossible. Yet here we are. I don't think you can force acceptance on yourself. You are in a hard place just now but I found it's a stage of grieving for the person you were. I have terrible times but in between there is some light in the darkness. Do what makes you happy. I read a lot, although I don't think I'm going to get through all the stuff on my Kindle, I'll give it a go. Please talk to someone who understands, if you can. It really helps. xxx

Hi Tricia08022023 

I hope you're having a better day today. It's always in my head too. I've had Counselling, which helped and I always recommend Dame Deborah James latest book How to live when you could be dead. This was good for finding a way forward and managing my time as I can't work now. I also find that a walk usually sorts me out when my mind is all over the place. I don't think it's something we can come to terms with, it's more making the best of a bad situation.

A x

Music can be good. It can get to the essence of how you feel without defining anything or using words. If you play an instrument and can play a little, or sing, all the better. If not just listening can be a refuge. It can distract, it can also scaffold time, and just getting through time always brings change ... eventually.

1. I am struggling with waiting for some results I have good reason to be dreading. I have a total sense of humour failure about it all and have been feeling frustrated and angry with cancer. I think it's ok not to be heroic and brave,  it's ok to feel sorry for yourself.

hi Annamary Thankyou for responding. I am so sorry to read that you have found yourself in the same situation Sending you hugs and best wishes. xx

hi Sarah thankyou for the advice. I am so sorry you are in this horrible position. Iwillbe crossing my fingers that you get a positive outcome to your test results. Sending my love and best wishes to you.  tricia. xx

Hi Sistermoon. Thankyou for taking the time to respond to me. I really appreciate the good advice and will check out the book you have kindly recommended. Sending you love and best wishes.  Tricia xx

Hey Tricia, My advice is to just roll with it. I've been living with this for 3 years now and the fear comes back from time to time - usually when I'm at a low point because of other factors which just pile up and accentuate everything else. When I'm motivated and in my studio the thoughts are banished, but if, as some might say, I'm feeling like I've  'lost my mojo' then I get very gloomy, but then, we're human, not machines.. I try to just tell 'it' to 'F**k orf'. But coping will get better. Rainie x

Thankyou Rainieday. Iappreciate your advice. xx

Hi Rainie. I’m still working my way round this app! And found this message. I have incurable lung cancer. Diagnosed last October. My oncologist said last Friday that it hasn’t spread and is keeping me on chemo intravenously. 
I’m feeling as if I can’t do this, as i’m tired of feeling rubbish all the time. It’s only in the third week that I can do more stuff. Dark thoughts creep in, is it worth it?! 
I do have lots to keep me going…if i choose to. 
Rant over..off to church now! Where I know I’ll be loved but not totally understood. 
Judy xxxx