Struggling with diagnosis given this week

Welcome RoRo....notice all these replies...this group of people are amazing.

I like u jumped into 'incurable' which floored me, didn't see that coming. But the support and love in this group has been such an uplifting experience.

Everything said i agree with. Nothing much I can add.

You'll note we have a gardening, book, hobbies feed too. I love seeing what people are doing with their lives and it encourages me to do things instead of brooding when I get so tired or  in pain.

Also on here we have people going through different types of cancers, different treatments and the support and advice is shared from the people who are truly experiencing this. 

It's a scary time but I know that this lot of nutters will be with me to make me laugh and hug me when I cry.

Welcome sweety and all the very best for the future

Thank you. I will definitely explore the site more now. I can see how wonderful everyone is

Thank you for taking the time to write, it really feels like connecting into something positive. 

Sorry you have not only had such devastating news, but that you also received it out of the blue with little support. Everyone on this forum has a stage 4 diagnosis. I am hoping you misheard ‘untreatable’ - stage 4 is often described as ‘incurable’ but there are often treatments, and many of us live fairly normal lives. If you are able to share a little more of your diagnosis and the medication that is proposed, you may find others with similar diagnosis and treatment pathway.

It is an awful shock. My own stage 4 diagnosis was delivered over the phone as an “oh and by the way” when discussing a scan that had been done for other reasons towards the end of the treatment for my primary cancer. I thought I was going to be discussing the final steps, only to find the ladder had been kicked away. I don’t think I will ever forget that day. However it did get easier and I am sure it will for you too.

I have been careful never to ask for a prognosis. I don’t want a “use by date” sitting over me, nor is there ever much certainty in these things. My advice would be to take it one day at a time. I appreciate you need to think about your kids but hopefully there will be plenty of time for that. For most of us this isn’t an instant death sentence. If you saw me, or many of the others on the street, you would not immediately think stage 4 cancer.

Wishing you all the best. 

Hi. I got my breast cancer diagnosis in October. I had my mastectomy in November. I was due to start chemotherapy in January  I then got diagnosed with secondary breast cancer in my bones. So i was started on hormone blocking tablets and Ribociclib. I have a 12 year old son. We had already told him, I was having chemotherapy. So we had to tell him, I wasn't having chemotherapy, but having medication as I have some cancer in my back. Its been tough to come to terms with. I have reached out to my local cancer wellbeing centre for support

Oh Sparkles, sorry to hear that you have had these diagnoses. I can't begin to understand how you could tell your 12 year old son. How awful that must have been. 

Sending you and your son many hugs and kisses.

Tvman x

I am not sure how much he took on board. We just said I have cancer in my bones. We didn't really fully explain that I am living with cancer and what that means. Its really on a tell him as much as he needs to know basis. Its been a tough few months 

I think you're right to tell him on a need to know basis, probably too much for him to take onboard. As you say, it's got to be so very tough for you. 

Tvman x

Hi, I will be starting on the same medication it sounds like, although it seems to take forever to get to the point where I actually get them. I just want to feel like something is happening to push back a bit. I finally told my kids, after waiting for something to be out of the way. It was so hard but after constantly having potential ways of saying it going round it my head it feels better to have it in the open.  I will look into where my local cancer wellbeing centre is, thank you for that advice and for responding to my message x

How old are your children? I have recently started the HOPE course at my local cancer wellbeing centre. Its really helped me. Also do you have a Big C near you. They have been really helpful too. I was started quickly on my medication  I had radiotherapy in March,, so had to stop the Ribociclib then, so I did have a break