Do not resuscitate

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Sorry to bring down the mood, but I am very upset. 
I am due to start chemo on Thu and I’m hoping if I go through it all, it will give me extra time as I look at posts on here and lots of people are beating the odds.

The palliative nurse asked me about resuscitation and I told her my wishes on Monday. Today the forms arrived signed by my doctor together with injections should my pain increase.

Cant help thinking they know something I don’t and it makes it imminent, can’t bring myself to say what ‘it’ is, but I think you know what I mean.

What do others think? Please let me know.


  • Dear Mags123, no need to apologise. It’s better to share your worries or concerns.  Firstly, I don’t have personal experience of being asked about my wishes regarding ‘DNR’. However, my elderly mum spent a lot of time in hospital last year and I lost count of the amount of times I was asked about my mum’s wishes regarding resuscitation. It happened each time a different doctor spoke to me. My mum was eventually discharged into a Care Home and is still here over a year later. So I hope, in some way, whilst my mum’s situ wasn’t cancer related, my reply might reassure you. I am wishing you all the very best for Thursday and chemo xxxxxx.

  • Hi Mags

    I see no one has been in, perhaps

    they do not have any answers for you, i will be honest neither do i..

    I cannot imange how you are feeling, and i cannot even put myself in the situation.

    I think you have to get some answers as such, regarding the forms and injections, is well worth a phone call tomorrow, to explain things, to you, before you start chemo on Thursday.

    I do not think, as you are thinking some thing  imminent, think more a precaution  than anything, as things can and do change as we know.

    Though you are to start chemo Thursday, and i think hold on to that,


  • Oh Mags so sorry to hear your news. All I can say is try to keep going one day at a time. I hope your not in to much pain. As for DNR its your choice, I personally haven't been asked that. I think it could be a case of your nurse and doctor are crossing the Ts and dotting the I' s Your starting chemo so your oncologist must think it can help you otherwise I don't think they'd do it. I must say I know this has been a kick in the butt for you but keep going.  Sending good vibes hugs and love xx


  • Hi Mags123

    I have had a similar thing. I've had awful problems with my recent RIG fitting, and was having the district nurses coming out and my own Cancer Nurse, Michaela. 

    Michaela asked if i had a 'just in case pack'  I said i didn't know what that was, so no. Apparently it's a special pack of medication kept in the event of me taking a 'turn for the worst'. I have picked the prescription up, put by in a box and labelled it.

    I haven't been asked about the DNR, but while i was in the Hospice having my pain and RIG managed i noticed a leaflet about Advanced Care Plan. This is a plan you write out to say what you would like to happen when your not in a position to communicate it.

    The doctor in there did ask if i had thought about my end of life care, i told him that i had done the Care Plan, but couldn't say or talk anymore about it because when i do i just well up, maybe one day i will be able to, but not now.

    I did do my plan while i was in there, as i was in the right setting and frame of mind if you like. I knew if i waited until i got home and back to 'normal life' i wouldn't do it. Once i know things are going down hill i will make my family and care team aware of it.  So i suppose in some ways that would cover the DNR bit as well. 

    Good luck with your Chemo, i hope it all goes well.

    Cat x

    • Thank you Ruby. Very kind of you to reply to me and that does make me feel better.

    Wishing you all the best too. x

    Ps Sorry for late reply but I couldn’t find your reply until now. I don’t think I’ve got the hang of this site yet.

  • Thank you Ellie.

    That is a good idea. I will ask.

    All the best Ellie and sorry for the late reply. I could see I had a message from you, but I just couldn’t find it until now.

    Best wishes


  • Hello Moi,

    Thank you for replying.

    Yes, you are right about the chemo. Thank you for pointing that out. It’s helpful when someone else tells you.

    Sorry for late reply, but I couldn’t find you kind people’s replies. Glad I managed to as they have made me feel better.

    Big hug and good vibes back.

  • Thank you Cat.

    Think maybe the explanation about mine was missing and I was left the injections and forms without being told ‘the just in case’ bit.I was asked about resuscitation by the palliative care nurse, just wasn’t expecting the forms and injections to be dropped off by someone who took my blood from the GP surgery. Think I am very sensitive to anything if I’m honest.

    Thank you for explaining your experience and for your good wishes.

    All the best,


  • Good morning Mags, I do think when things like that form and injection are dumped on you out of the blue you have every right to feel sensitive . Now put them in a box like Cat has and leave them there and get on with your life, class it as preparations done.  I think you should give your self a freak today . Hugs and good vibes xx


  • Sorry ment TREAT  xx