After a couple of weeks of xrays, ct scans, a lung flow test, a meeting with a Respiratory Consultant (in which he said it was inoperable and spread to my bones) a bone biopsy and 5 sessions of radiotherapy, I finally have a date next week to meet with an Oncologist.
I presume its to tell me what type of LC I have and whether they think its treatable. Or not.
I know everybody says to remain positive and I try my hardest to be positive as I think it's important, but I also think I need to be a bit realistic as well.
I think the fact that it's inoperable, it's spread to my bones AND I have a lot of pain, could mean that the prognosis isn't great and even though in my head imagine them saying 2- 5 years with treatment, my heart is telling me to be prepared for bad news.
The realist in me is to be prepared for another major shock of them saying 'months'
I reacted badly when I had my appointment with the RC when he told me "it's not good news".
I'm usually a calm, composed person, but I started crying and didn't stop blubbing for two days. My partner says I was even crying in my sleep!
I'm worried at how l will cope with further bad news. I'm also worried my partner will take it badly. I insisted on going in on my own the first time. but he wants to come in with me this time.
How can I mentally prepare myself ? And him? (Big ask)
Amd sorry to post such a depressing topic on such a lovely sunny day. Xxx
Hi - it sounds from your first paragraph that this is your first meeting with oncology? If so, I wouldn't see it as a negative thing at all. The oncologist will advise treatment options going forwards.
I really like going to see my oncologist even though right right now we're potentially one cycle away from my current treatment being withdrawn. I get updates, see the scan pics, learn what he is thinking about the way forwards, the options, and the triggers for each decision. The triggers (thresholds) help me prepare when/if it goes awry. So the bad news is less likely to have a big impact. "We've got to stay friends for a few more years yet" I told him on Tues. He laughed. 
And yes, he does tell me things I don't want to hear. But he also tells me the positives, and the data on which it is all based. He also answers every one of my Qs and does everything he says he will do. Also, just talking face-to-face, after lockdowns, makes me feel like a person, engaged, and not just a number. It's a really important relationship and vital to build a trusting relationship with oncology.
