I have just joined this forum after being told head and neck cancer is likely terminal. Tomorrow I am back with the team to discuss my options. Such a hard time of year with the cold and dark and I really feel like the world is coming to an end. I guess I am grieving for my joy in food, chatting with an understandable voice and my previous looks. All these things are likely to be taken from me, they say probably, if I agree to a further operation which could give me longer. I’m fighting it but feel quite blue today.
Hi so sorry you are feeling a little blue today.
Well you do not need your voice here only in the words you type, and your previous looks, people accept you for who you are, and what you are, that is the main thing.
You have a right to fill blue, and i wish i could help you, as such, though use this group, because we all understand, what you are saying, at some point, we have been there, i have been incurable from day one, and i m not the person i used to be, for other reasons, as well as cancer .
I am pleased you have reached out, and others will come along, to support you, as well, that is what we are here for.
Though i just wanted to say Hi.xxx.
Hi Posi and a warm welcome to this terrific group. I know, as does everyone here how it feels to get that diagnosis but things will get better once you have discussed a plan of action with our oncology team. I think the not knowing what lies ahead is the scary part.
Nowadays they don't really use the term 'terminal' rather than that they say incurable! This is because every month they are discovering new drugs to help with all types of cancer. There are a lot of us here (and that includes Ellie and myself) who have lived well after our expected sell by date. Ask your Team what options you have. I had surgery then went on a Trial Drug and it worked for me. Others have had chemo, radiotherapy or Immunotherapy's and have also outlived expectations! I try to take each day as it comes and enjoy it. That's the way I cope, I'm sure as Ellie said others will be by giving their coping methods etc. ask as many questions as you like, someone here has been there, done that, wore the tee shirt! I think the main thing is never give up!
Love Annette x
Hi Posi. Ellie and Annette have said it all. I am years past my sell by date as well. Plenty could turn up around the corner. Of course you are miserable but keep posting, it helps everybody.
Hi Posi.. Nice to meet you albeit electronically.
So many in thegroup have already responded (well that’s what they do, always happy to support) and talked about joyously being past their sell by date. I like to think of it slightly differently. I’m past my best before date which means I’m not quite as fresh as I was but still quite tasty. I’m sure you will be the same.
Good luck with your consultation and planned treatment.
Keep positive.
Sending virtual hugs
Rojan
Whatever cancer throws your way, we’re right there with you.
We’re here to provide physical, financial and emotional support.
© Macmillan Cancer Support 2025 © Macmillan Cancer Support, registered charity in England and Wales (261017), Scotland (SC039907) and the Isle of Man (604). Also operating in Northern Ireland. A company limited by guarantee, registered in England and Wales company number 2400969. Isle of Man company number 4694F. Registered office: 3rd Floor, Bronze Building, The Forge, 105 Sumner Street, London, SE1 9HZ. VAT no: 668265007