Only 3weeks past since being told 6to 8mths

Morning - I keep waking up at the other end, pre 6am!  

Things definitely do get better once treatment starts.  As well feeling like something is at last happening to expel the "visitors" you start to get into a routine with it.  I don't know how typical this, is but I felt fatigued and just bleugh for months in the time leading up to diagnosis and once my treatment started, I actually felt normal again.   

You are totally right with the Control thing.  People on here have remarked the same.  The consultants deciding whether an appt was in person or phone riled me - let's have a chat about it rather than you decide huh?!  But the straw that broke the camel's back was the steroids which I didn't want to go on, and no alternative.  That really underlined the lack-of-control to me.   

Loss of control is hard. I've found concentrating on what I can control helps. You will feel better once things are moving again. Take all the help you are offered. Sometimes a sleepng pill from your doctor can help. I'd never taken them before but they really can help you. Nothing worse than things running through your mind in the middle of the night. Lots of people have been given a time limit. I was told months, then he said 'maybe two years.'  Many people are here long after a doctor's estimate. They don't have a crystal ball. Take care. 

I plan to keep fighting  for as long as I can. I had to be straight with my 3boys . I have told them I will lie to them about any of it and have siad they can seek help to deal with it if they want .  I can not help but worry about them and my wife . I do have days were I am really  struggling but there are days were I think  I have this.   A day at a time 

Thanks for your reply. At present because of treatment for cancer in my brian they said Its to dangerous to give something to sleep at this time . I have consultant  this Friday so hopefully get a start date for next treatment. It is all the waiting about for start dates but consultant said it will be within next 2 weeks . Its still very raw and often having days were I am really emotional.  I will keep fighting for as lon as I can.   HOPE EVERYONE  HAS A GOOD DAY 

I really hope things start moving for you soon. I found out my grim prognosis on 16th December. What a Christmas it was.

My 25 year old daughter accepted my diagnosis really calmly. So did my husband. I don't think they've fully absorbed the reality of it all. Maybe that's healthy.

It's hard to think of leaving your family. I'm just not contemplating that for now. There's enough going on which needs dealing with immediately.

I've found the Macmillan nurses to be brilliant with practical help and advice. 

"Sufficient unto the day is the evil thereof" 

Take care. 

Hi Fermer, Sorry to meet you here. I think a persons attitude can make a big difference. You need to have confidence in your Oncology Team and learn as much as you can from them by asking questions! (do not google, their figures are outdated). Never think of yourself as terminal but think incurable but treatable! No one can give you a date! I am well past my sell by date, and I'm not alone here, there are more of us than you think! Keep going!

Thank you so much for your support and your  right . At this time its a daay at a time. I have a close relationship with my 3boys ,and couldnt do any ofbit without my wife . Thanks again 

Hello Fermer.

It's much too soon to accept what has happened. You will go to bed in turmoil and wake up in the middle of the night and in the morning feeling the same.

I can say that a lot of those feelings of panic and despair will gradually ease off. They have to otherwise you would go pop.

As Annette said, dont dwell on your prognosis, I was given 8 months to a year in 2017, if I'm not mistaken that's long gone.

The amount of new treatment about is astounding, hopefully you will profit from it. Best wishes.

It will get better Fermer, but it takes some time to adjust to the new reality. We are all scared and we all have sleepless nights. But you will find your own way through. Just keep being as positive as you can and try to think of each day as what you can get out of it, not what cancer is stopping you doing. You might not be able to drive your car, but you can make sure that you remain in the driving seat as far as your cancer is concerned. Have treats, make good memories and, when treatment begins, hang on and think about that cancer getting a good kicking. In the meantime, offload it all on here, because whatever it is, there will be people here who will know just how you feel. Hugs from Rainie x

Hi Fermer

sorry that you’re here with us but it’s good to meet you. Wise words from all on here. The docs don’t really know and treatments are improving all the time, new trials etc. Hiw old are your children? The younger they are the harder it is I think but there are lots of people here going through similar and can help you. Chat with the MacMillan nurses and do anything you can to stop the negative thoughts, meditation, yoga, mindfulness etc. find what floats your boat and do that to calm your mind. No amount of worrying will change things but you will feel better for being calmer. You can’t control the cancer or necessarily the treatment but you can control your emotional response. And you can make the time that you do have with your family as happy and as positive as possible so that your last months or hopefully years will be as good as they can be and your children will have all those lovely memories.

Good luck with it all and let us know how you’re doing 

Hugs and love

Jac x