Panicking as Results brought forward!!!

Hi Annette 

I know you’re right, it’s not easy to change how I am as always been a worrier anyway, plus this is all quite new still. I have had counselling and she seemed to think I was doing ok, as still getting up and carrying on as normal. It’s the scans that set me back and I can’t see that getting any better. 
I have moments where I tell myself off and stop moping, then other days, I just fall apart but still get dinner done, dressed, hair washed and make up on, I do do it all, I have to, as still got two older kids here and a husband, I  just have to push myself some days, which I’m sure is normal. I will try to keep occupied today until my results tomorrow, but it’s just not easy. 
thank you for listening, I’ve saved your message to remind me  

xxx

Hi Jane scanxiety is a real thing, and it sounds as if you are pushing yourself hard to keep your family happy, please look after yourself, you don't want to burn out.

Best wishes for your appointment tomorrow. 

Thank you. Yes, I am. I’m trying to keep everyone happy as I feel so guilty with all this. 
I have my mum, dad, sister, all wanting to know every detail, but I feel guilty for burdening them, but if I keep it to myself, I feel so alone. I can’t win! 
I feel exhausted tbh as everyone expects me to still have the same energy and I don’t! 

Thank you x

Hi Jane, I've just seen your new post. Just want to echo what Annette has said. - as usual all good straightforward sense from her.  Also, please keep reminding yourself that you are not here to come up to the expectations of others. You are in a new ball-game here, as our American readers might phrase it.  And you set the rules for how to deal with your cancer.

Tell your family in a pleasant but straightforward way that you don't want to talk about it ad nauseum and that you will let them know of any developments that they need to know about. Do not feel any guilt whatsoever about letting some things go - housework for instance - these things are not important. Do not feel guilt about the need to lie down. Make a hot water bottle, get under the quilt and read a book or take a nap. If others expect you to have the same energy as you used to, then it's time to remove that illusion and tell them that things have changed. And you need to show them just how things have changed. Set your own parameters Jane, based on your needs.

Will be thinking of you tomorrow. breathe slowly and in rhythm. Be kind to yourself.

Rainie x

Here is a plan, trashy tv, lots of chocolate and nice bubble bath.

We are all here for you

Keith 

• Thank you Keith. I might add a vodka too  
• jane 

Even better

Good advice from Popgate Jane. Scan results cause huge anxiety. Try to be positive. I wish you good luck and will have everything crossed for. Big hugs and piscine vibes to you x

Jane you're as scanxious as the rest of us but perhaps over time we have learned how to deal with it and not be quivering wrecks. I think with time it will be easier for you.

You still manage to get dinner sorted for your husband and two older kids? What??? Do I need to spell it out? Your family and friends need to realise that you're not well and can't carry on as usual.

Tvman xx

Hi Tvman 

I’m hoping that’s the case, that I’ll get more used to it and stop the panicking, so much. 
Of course, I have no choice, husband at work all day, son at work and stepson at school. I’m still doing everything, my husband is brilliant, and helps as soon as he gets in, but I like to try and do as much as I can, to save him having to. It’s manageable at the moment, 

Thank you 

xx