It’s me

Belinda, everything you are feeling is completely normal. This decision does not to be made overnight, so take your time to get to the right decision for you. 

I am going to tell you a story now, which I have shared before, so I apologise if you heard this before. My mum passed from ovarian cancer. She had so many treatments, lots of chemo and 2 drug trials at the Marsden We had got to the point where we knew the trial was no longer working, and we were in the car heading to the Marsden to find out what was to happen next. It was a 2 hour journey, and my Dad and brother were also with us. She said that if they offered her chemo she was going to say no, she had had enough. My Dad and brother were really put out by this and were insisting that she had to carry on. I said that it was completely up to mum, it was her that had to go through it, so it was her choice. My brother was furious with me, but I know my mum appreciated that I had her back. When we got to the Marsden mum had stopped to talk to someone. Then I realised she was talking to Peter Andre. He asked her why she was there and spoke to her about her treatment. When she came away she said that she had decided to have the chemo. Now I don't know what Peter had said to her, the point is he was a stranger, someone who had no connection to my mum, who was never going to speak to her again, but it gave her the opportunity to voice her thoughts to someone she really didn't know, and that gave her clarity.  

This is why the Macmillan support team are so important. It gives you the opportunity to talk to someone who has no connection with you. They will not try to make the decision for you, but will help you to decide for yourself. 

Come here to rant as much as you like, we are here for you x 

Oh Belinda, what a shock for you and what terribly unexpected news for you. All of us here are empathising with you, I don't know whether that helps you but it certainly helps me and I'm sure it helps all of my friends in this group. 

What to do? As you say, damned if you do and damned if you don't. I can't advise you what to do because I think it's against the rules of the community. I can only say that as it has been said elsewhere that I would try anything that might help me. As Chelle has so rightly said, please phone the MacMillan helpline and talk to someone. 

Come here and rant away, relate your thinking as much as you want. My mum died from lung cancer a few years ago. When she died she was not alone, my two brothers and I were all with her. The crying will stop as it has for me. I had a grandson who was a few months old and just two days ago I became a granddad for the second time to a beautiful little girl. I spoke with my daughter yesterday and we talked about when I was diagnosed and she told me that she did a lot of crying too but she's delighted that I'm still here, she said that it seemed her world had fallen in on her. I didn't know how badly she had taken the news although we all knew it was something serious. It finally emerged that I had a very rare cancer that a GP would expect to have only one or two in their practice throughout their time as a GP. 

I hope you get a glimpse of hope that you deserve and that you can grasp. In the meantime take care and stay safe Belinda.

Tvman xx

Free12

Sorry you had such rotten news.  Good luck whatever you decide is best for you.  Take care.

Hi ,

I can only echo what others are saying. You must take your time to think through your decision. Sounding out with a stranger via the support line may well help you clarify your thoughts All of us dread leaving loved ones behind. But whatevre you decide, the most improttant thing is to make use of the time you have to do the things that matter to you, make you happy, even in the most miniscule ways, and make some happy memories for the others.

Hi Everyone 

It’s me the ranter, some people think a should try that CBD oil that could help me, so now that has confused me more l want to do what’s best for me and my family. Does anyone know what it like or can do or not I need help..am going to go and see my GP about it and her thoughts.

Thank you 

Belinda xxx

My son has me on CBD oil. He's convinced it's a cure. I take it, but I'm not sure that it does much. I know it tastes like mud!

You might be a ranter but your our ranter, never forget that.

Seeing the GP is probably a good idea, they could have some more solutions. 

I usually cry when I see the quack, then I feel better, odd eh? Xxxxx

Hi Everyone 

me again l will try and a appointment on Monday that’s if a can past the woman on the front desk as every time I ring it’s the same thing why? What’s wrong? Can it wait? The worst one is it important,I feel like screaming at her I don’t think she looks at the computer when I ring so I have to explain again why I need to see the doctor and I get is 2/3 days later I can have a appointment with my doctor..

Thanks Everyone 

Belinda xxxxx

Hi Belinda, I am so sorry you find yourself in this predicament. I know if it was my GP he would be annoyed if I didn't get to see him when I needed it. Some of the receptionists are really nice but there is always at least one that's a little hitler! Sounds like you get her! I would phone on Monday and ask for an emergency appointment and if she starts asking questions, just tell her if you can't see the doctor today, then you'd like a home visit! They cannot refuse that! You need time to sit down and discuss things properly with a non family member. I think Chelle's story about the stranger was great!

I really feel for you and I hope you get professional help either from your GP or McMillan. This is not an easy decision to make! Good luck and I'm sure whatever you choose will be the right thing for you! We are all here to support you!

Hi Anndanv

i always seems to get her and is so rude with it, was like the last I went to the doctors when I was having treatment I asked to be put in a side room or somewhere I would be safe so she did but then she sent in a child with her mum so I started to talk to the mum you will not believe what her daughter had chickenpox.. I went total mad the doctor came out of her room to see what was going on so explained to my doctor what had happened let’s just say my doctor was not to happy about what she had done..l think she was taken over rocks by my doctor but it didn’t stop her from being nasty..

Thank you 

Belinda xxxxx