Anxiety about not seeing my family again

Bevrax

looking at your profile we are following similar paths - having just finished chemo since September after my cancer returned metasised to lungs kidneys  and bones.  My latest scan showed most lesions reduced apart from 2 that had grown by a mm or 2.  They said my body needs a break for 3 months- until June- when I will have another scan.  I feel because of the virus they may not stick to this and I may not get the treatment I need.

I'm sorry I don't know the answer to your question but do feel your worries.  Virtual hugs and thoughts during this time xx

Hi Bevrax

I think a lot of us will be going through similar worries and it’s completely understandable. There’s nothing we can do about it so worrying doesn’t help. I think it is well worth spending some time working on the anxiety - it’s so much more productive then spending the same amount of time worrying. I find the headspace app useful for this. The daily meditation definitely helps me reduce my anxiety 

xx

Hi Bevrax

Welcome to the group although I would much rather have met you elsewhere. As far as I am aware cancer treatment is being continued during the current crisis, however I can understand your concern because our immune system may be suppressed. If I can allay your fears a little, I have a blood cancer, my immune system is certainly suppressed yet I was at my cancer unit for treatment 2 weeks ago and there was no talk of my treatment being suspended.

I would suggest you contact your oncologist and ask him/her.aboit whether your treatment will still be continuing. There are members of our group still undergoing treatment still having treatment right now.

Are you self isolating? I looked at your profile and you don't say anything about family. Whether or not you have family, the advice is to self isolate so that you are not exposed to the Corona virus. For the past few days, my wife, my son and I are self isolating as a unit and we intend to continue to do so for the foreseeable future.. My wife works in a school and she has been advised by her principal to remain at home with me until such time as the school will be up and running again. 

Ok wish you well in the coming weeks and months and I hope we will have many chats as we get through this difficult time.

Tvman x

Morning Bevrax 

So sorry you find yourself here. As if things weren't scary enough, it's completely understandable that you're worried.

I'm on weekly palliative chemo and was at the hospital yesterday for a scan. I was told that a great deal of work is going on to ensure that people like me continue to get treatment. The only person who can give you any reassurance on your treatment plan is your own Oncologist so as tvman said, it's worth talking to them.

It's taken me a few days to get my head around the enormity of this situation and the implications of the restrictions. Every single person I know has good reason to feel anxious and I agree with , the big challenge will be managing that anxiety in the coming weeks and months. We have no control over the situation, only in how we respond to it.

More than ever we have to be kind to ourselves and I hope you'll find the support and suggestions from here will help you. I'll be trying the headspace app, that's been on my 'to do' list for a while.

xx

Hi Bevrax I am anxious about this situation too.I am having a weekly chemo and responding well some tumors dissapeared even.Currently i am on 4 weeks break which I requested but still visiting the hospital for PICC care and so far everything goes normal like before.I would be really angry if they stop the treatment because I want to live too.

Before i started treatment I couldnt even breath because of the tumors in my lungs now i can walk long distances with no problems.I cant imagine myself to suffer like that again and have tumors "coming out of my ears".

I rather have the risk with chemo then stop the treatment.Cancer is painful and horrible disease and I dont want to be in pain

After reading posts and listening to people it would appear that it very much depends on where you are and who your consultant is to what you are told or offered regarding treatment. In many ways I think that has always been the case. 

I am pretty sure that had my oncologist have read my scans for the meeting 3 weeks ago I would have been offered treatment but the difference two weeks made was enormous. We can see that by what has happened in the shops, with the economy, the TV coverage and of course the mounting anxiety throughout the country. 

My oncologist was talking of enormous cuts in TN the resources for cancer patients including staffing and beds. 

I can't say I am happy that my treatment has been stopped and no alternatives given hence reducing my life expectancy for something that I still feel is an unknown. However I am willing to accept it as I have made it to 60 and had treatment for a few years, although that said I am still fighting on best I can. If I was younger though or had young children I don't think I would be that accepting of the situation. 

At present I am waiting for the Pallative Care team to get in touch but have no idea when that will be I have a terrible feeling they will be experiencing resource issues also. 

My breathing is the biggest issue I am having at present so some help with that would help so I can sympathize with you not wanting to go back to that stage. 

Hopefully because you are on the treatment you will be fine to continue especially with good results. I was unfortunate re timing and lax NHS care, little did I know how bad the consequences could be. My oncologist was not willing to take the risk as he said there would be no beds, no blood for transfusions and no vital equipment.

On the bright side we have no idea how long all this will last and how many people will actually be affected to a point where they need care. I know there is panic at the moment and people are unfortunately blocking up the systems and exhausting resources. As time goes on things might be able to be relaxed and things return to normal. 

Take care and try not to worry too much. I hope you get answers soon. 

Hi Maz thats an awful news regarding your treatment.Its not fair.You are only 60 it made me cry.Cant you do something about it?They cant leave you like this thats not a care.

Thanks Janet 

I am no novice at having to fight for treatment and have done very successfully in the past. 

I am however going with it this time for three reasons. 

Firstly until the panic settles around this virus and it is sorted out a bit I'd be fighting an unknown. When I went for my appointment on Thursday they was no fewer than 6 well qualified ( sisters and staff nurses) taking temperatures as people entered the building. There was about 10 patients. One even dispensed hand gel. Many beds in wards are empty awaiting the influx. Now when I was in hospital you were lucky if a student nurse took temperatures and people could usually do their own sanitizer although I know people have been stealing it. 

Secondly I am not really sure there is anything else left to try my options have always been quite limited due to my allergies. My oncologist is rather forgetful so he may not remember what he has tried. However he is also very up to date with what is out there and once tuned into my case has up to now always found something that worked. 

My friends and family have always wondered.why I never changed oncologist and simply I have know him for best part of 7 years I know his faults, he knows I will not let things go and sometimes the mistakes he makes can be used to my advantage and he usually backs me if I will take up a fight. This time I could see that he feels defeated by what is happening also and he is having to make choices and give news he does not like but is the party line. 

Thirdly I am very tired and although I had some very bad and frightening episodes over the years I would say on a whole I was probably operating as a 7 sometimes more. I seem now to have dropped almost overnight all the way to a 2 on good days. So although it would have been good to have been given some options I am not sure realistically I could have managed more chemo. 

This being inside is however doing my head in but I am too ill to do anything. I tried repotting a plant today in the garden and had to lie down 3 times before finishing. I am considering hiring a wheelchair so I can go out along the coast or in the country. I've lost a bit of weight lately so my husband should be ok pushing me. 

Take care 

Hi Maz

I am so very sorry to hear how rapidly you’ve gone downhill. Stop thinking about hiring a wheelchair and just do it! 

I suspect you’re right that the treatment options available depend in part on your consultant but right now, the corona virus is also playing a big part. The official NHS England guidance says cancer treatment should continue but asks doctors to weigh up the risks and benefits of treatment. For some patients, the risks of coming into hospital and weakening their immune systems with cytotoxic treatment simply outweigh the benefits. If you’re interested, you can read more here: 

https://www.england.nhs.uk/coronavirus/wp-content/uploads/sites/52/2020/03/Specialty-guide_Cancer-and-coronavirus_17-March.pdf

Cancer Research UK is monitoring policy announcements and running a blog:

https://www.google.co.uk/amp/s/scienceblog.cancerresearchuk.org/2020/03/19/coronavirus-and-cancer-latest-updates/amp/

These are extraordinary times and we are all facing tough decisions, although some tougher than others. It must be heartbreaking to be an oncologist right now. My heart goes out to you, Maz, as one who’s been caught up in all this with such devastating consequences. 

With love and hugs xxx

Hi ,

in my area you can get a wheelchair from a local community transport organisation free but with a £10 deposit.  The wheelchairs are provided by the Red Cross.  However, when I've looked at the Red Cross website they charge a weekly fee.  Perhaps just put a local search for free wheelchairs on Google.

Wishing you all the best,

Gragon xx