How’s your New Years Eve / Hogmanay shaping?

Hi

OMG!!!!! Getting your licence back must feel like a new lease of life. I would be lost without my car. I live on the edge of a small town and it’s too far to walk to the local shops, never mind walk back again. I have so much running around to do for my girls too. Add the dog in - the nearest place I can let her off the lead is actually not far but again too far for me to walk there, round the cricket pitch and home again. Well. Enough said. Here’s to you, your freedom and the open road. 

I’m pleased to hear about your new treatment plan too. I’ve had weekly taxol and it wasn’t that bad in the scheme of things. Certainly not as bad as carbo taxol. Is it weekly for you? It’s time consuming - so I’d say good decision on the work - but once you’re in the swing of things it’s ok. I imagine you’ll make the most of your ten days off with lovely dog walks. I was out with Noodle today and saw loads of wild snowdrops along with something yellow that I want to calm anemones but I think might be winter aconites. I should look it up. At any rate, both were beautiful and both are a sign of winter ending. 

As for friends, well, what can I say? I sometimes feel as though I’m carrying a big ball of pain. It takes both my arms to hold it. Sometimes I need someone to hold it for a while. Some people are strong enough. Some aren’t. There’s no judgement in that. It’s hard to tell from the outside who is who, that’s all 

xxx

Hi It's so good to see your post! I thought this thread was over as I haven't had any notifications since the first week in Jan, so When I saw this one (25th) I was so pleased to read you were home at last. That was a long haul for you. I didn't have a great start to the year but hopefully things are starting to get back on track at last!

It's a very true saying "there's nout as queer as folk" when I was in the cancer hospital a few years ago, it seemed everyone and their Gran wanted to visit. One or two of them I hadn't spoken to for over a decade! My actual best friend, whom I longed to chat with didn't visit at all because when she asked my daughter when was a good time to come, my daughter told her I had lots of visitors, every visiting hour. So my friend decided to wait until I came home to visit but didn't tell my daughter.  I did not know of this until after I got home and as you can imagine was very upset about it. However my daughter was doing her best to juggle everything so she could visit with her brother & dad when no one else was there! Once I got home, I didn't hear from my "hospital visitors" again for 8 months or so when the Christmas cards came through the door. I remember saying to my husband that they only came because they didn't think I'd be going home again, so that they'd done they're duty visit before I popped my clogs! I was so annoyed at them for keeping my friends away but what can you do! I hope your friend comes to see you soon!

WOW! Getting your driving license back is a milestone!! How long were you without it? I was without mine for 8 months due to melanoma in my right eye! I think when you have driven for years, you feel trapped and hate having to ask people to take you places. Even although they are happy to help, it's not the same eh!! It will make such a difference to you when you can go to the hospice and not clock watch as someone is picking you up! You will be able to stop for that second (or 3rd) cuppa!  

Well a new treatment plan too!! It's all happening at once and I feel I've missed everything and let you down for not keeping up to date. Good luck with your recovery which will be a lot easier when you are not working! Your new treatment and driving everywhere singing when alone in the car! That's  what I did, I was so happy to have my independence back! You have been in my prayers, like all my virtual friends here!

Sorry for the long post! Take Care 

Hi I loved your foot in mouth description! There's a lot of it about! "Oh you look so well!" "Oh how R you doing dear?" Etc etc

Yup. It was winter aconites with the snowdrops. There were loads of them. So cheery. 
xx

Hi Tinalay

Glad to hear you sounding so much better and really positive about your driving license. I know you weren't keen on more chemo, so I really hope it works well and does not have irksome side effects. 

It's difficult with friends and family isn't it. My two oldest friends have only visited me once since my diagnosis, whereas less close friends have now become close friends. I rely on this community so much, I cannot express how important you all are to me.

Xx

Hi Tinalay

There has been so much happening in this group lately, I'm sorry I didn't get back to you. So sorry little Tina 

You've got your license back, brilliant! And with that, the most important thing, your independence, and a rise in mood. After my small stroke, I wasn't allowed to drive for a month and when my son and my wife went to work, I felt imprisoned, I can't begin to imagine how you felt. But it's OVER. Yayyyy. 

If I were you and I'd just got my license back after so long, I'd be in my car and I'd drive to the other side of the country, to the west coast of Ireland, take a rest and start to drive down the Wild Atlantic Way, book in to a hotel and then finish the drive, hotel again and drive back up to see what it looks like the other way and then home and meet my family who would be on edge the whole time I was away because I would have done it without their blessing. I'd spend the next hour deflecting the flak until their blood pressure got back to normal lol.

What about you Tinalay, your health probably won't allow you to do something like that, maybe I'm wrong, I'm not listening to your view. I'm being presumptuous, I'd love to hear you beat me back and give me a rollicking, ha ha. So where would you love to drive to? I don't know what part of the country you're in. 

Now before admin contact me and say I mustn't ask people where they live, I'm not. I've one good friend in the group who has so many coincidental views and episodes in their life that they could be my sibling. Speaking like that, I haven't exposed their sex, but they know that admin weren't too pleased that it seemed that I MAY have asked someone their real name, but I didn't! 

I need to say that I have many good friends in the group, without a doubt. 

Dear Tinalay

some of us here, appear to have lives like a soap opera. I find everybody’s posts here must more interesting and more worthwhile than TV. I hope I don’t offend anyone with that point but the non cancer side of our lives are entertaining. 

Ah... thinking of Tessa. Snowdrops will always be Tessa.

The talk of people finding visiting difficult struck a chord.

I just spent two weeks in hospital. My husband spent the whole time sighing and moaning about how difficult the journey to visit was. How he had no time for anything else and was so stressed  by it all. He even woke me if I was asleep when he arrived so his visit wouldn't be wasted.

I knew he chooses to "take care of me" by doing the cooking, which has been his hobby since he retired. Now he regards this as a geat service  and expects effusive thanks every time. But I never imagined that I could be causing such offense by being too ill to chat.

Who knew the life of a patient's partner could be so difficult!

I would find that infuriating! Any hint of martyrdom or long suffering around these things really touches a raw nerve. No doubt you would prefer NOT to have been in hospital for 2 long weeks and would love to be fully independent.

Perhaps these things are just easier to complain about than the scary bits of being our partners.

My husband used to ask me what my last slave died of and the answer was always the same. Devotion. 

I hope you're feeling much better.  xx