Just struggling with life.

Hi  and welcome to this corner of the Community.

Great that you are through treatment but as you say - why are you not moving on and living life again just like before?

A few things come to mind. You were diagnosed with cancer and have been through treatment, people who have not walked this road just do not understand and will think it’s all done with move on - if only it was that straight forward.

You are only a few months out from treatment so you are still in recovery - this takes time and a lot longer than you would hope.

Folks on this corner of the Community must think I am a dripping tap as I will always post this great paper as it does highlight just where you are at this point in life - have a look through it and come back with your thoughts as the paper will trigger some areas in your life at the moment.

We also have a very supportive Vulva cancer group that you may want to have a look at.

When you feel up to it try putting some information in your profile. This really helps others when answering. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. Just click on YOUR username, select 'Edit Profile'. Put as much or as little in your profile and you can amend it at any time - you can see members profiles by hitting our forum names.......like Thehighlander

You may also want to look in the group discussions tab and see some of the other threads that folks have put up.

Always around to walk this with you.

((hugs))

Hi Girky/Sarah,I hope you will find some support here,I can empathise with what you have written.You have been through a great deal in a short space of time and the recovery phase is much slower than we imagine.It's tough mentally and depressing when you just want to get on with life.I don't want to go on about cancer with my friends and family either.I am so grateful to be able to ramble on to the macmillan community,people understand they have been through the same range of emotions that cancer brings.Keep posting and hopefully you won't feel so alone.Love and best wishes Jane XX

Hi Sarah 

I have just finished treatment for breast cancer and I feel the same. I should be happy but I’ve upset my friends by not wanting them at the ringing off the bell. My sister came to every appointment and she was there but it was a very upsetting day. It should have been happy but I just couldn’t get to the bell to ring it and when I did I cried sore. I feel so ungrateful as some people don’t get to do what I did. I get where you are feeling so alone it’s really weird 

Hi @Goodie001 and welcome to the Online Community, although I am sorry to see you finding us and so sorry to hear that you are also finding the post treatment part hard.

This part of the cancer rollercoaster takes time and it’s all about taking each day as it comes. Do have a look though the great paper I often highlight as it does bring some order to the post treatment journey.

You may also find out very supportive Breast cancer group a great place to talk with folks who are post treatment as this will open up your concerns to a wider audience who know exactly what you are going through at the moment.

Just follow the link I have created then hit the ‘Join This Group’ tab just under the main group name, then go to the 'Start a Discussion' tab and set up your very own Discussion and introduce yourself to the group and ask your questions.

Talking to people face to face can help a lot so check to see if you have any Local Macmillan Support in your area or a Maggie’s Centre as these folks are amazing.

When you feel up to it try putting some information in your profile. This really helps others when answering. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. Just click on YOUR username, select 'Edit Profile'. Put as much or as little in your profile and you can amend it at any time - you can see members profiles by hitting our forum names.

All the very best.

I would like to thank you all for your kind words. Thank you mike for the great paper; it really did ring true. Understanding that the road to recovery doesn’t end with finishing treatment is important and reading other people’s stories has helped too. I just don’t think I was prepared for how much that one word would change me. Why do the bad times always have to come when things are going well? Right before being diagnosed I was given this great opportunity at work to become a team leader, I have worked hard over the last year for this and now it doesn’t seem important anymore. Everyone is so serious, as they should be, they are running a business, but I’m finding it hard to concentrate and forgetting thing. My boss and store manager are being supportive, but I feel I’m letting them down. Please tell me this doesn’t last forever; I love my job and the people I work with, but it just doesn’t feel the same anymore. I go to work and put on this brave face, yet I feel hollow inside.

The only things I know that have stayed the same in all of this is my love for my husband. For this I am truly grateful.

Thank you again for the support and I hope you don’t mind the rant.

King regards

Sarah xx

Hi again Sarah, all rant are allowed....... no it does not last for ever but you have been through a traumatic time and the body and mind needs time to recover and heal, so the forgetfulness etc is just part of the healing process.

Taking an honest approach with every part of life is good building blocks to move this forward and to build a new and stronger life.

I have a friend who was diagnosed with MS a number of years back - she is only on her mid 30s, can no longer work and she knows that her condition will just get worse and worse as the days and years go on......... but she says that MS will not rob her of living the best life she can and once things get worse she will just have to try harder to life as good a life as she can.

Its great that you are identifying some positives and these also are part of your building block ((hugs))

I completely understand how you feel. Once the treatment is over people are just waiting for you to be the person you were before. We think we will be the same but we’re not.

I’ve been dismissed from my job this week. I tried to go back after 6 months but I just couldn’t cope. I’m still not feeling recovered. None of my work colleagues understood. The only people who got it were the group at Maggie’s and it was only after listening to them that I realised that the post cancer journey goes on for years. It’s how you adjust to it that matters.

So do try and talk. Especially to your managers. They need to make adjustments 

Good luck x