Where do we belong??

Hi Red Mother 1,

You are still more than welcome in the community. There are a number of ppl in various groups who stay there to give/ get support.

So u could join the one u feel most appropriate, eg Chemotherapy, or just stay in this one, chipping in or starting new discussions, as u think fit. There's also a general Chat group and The Room, if u want to rant.

No, u don't carry on as if it never happened. Cancer changes your life in so many different ways, n that of your nearest n dearest too.

Take life one day at a time - trite, but oh so true.

If u want to chat face to face, it's worth finding out if there's a Maggie's centre or Macmillan centre local to you. See " in your area" on the home page. Or otherwise u can ring the Helpline on 0808 808 0000,8am to 8pm, 7 days/ week.

Keep in touch n let us know how the MRI went.

Thanks buttercup01

It's such a strange feeling. I just feel weirdly lost and empty as if something is missing. 

I will stay and look into other groups  too ️

Hi and a second welcome, to answer your questions.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes, but it may not look like it was before. I have to say, once all the dust had settled, I actually like my new life.

Yes it did happen and you got through it but you now in the last 1/3rd if the journey and for some this could be the hardest part.

We do have lots of Cancer experience groups you can have a look through.

You may find our various Macmillan Support Line Services to be helpful - call them on 0808 808 00 00This free service covers Emotional Support, Practical Information. Clinical Information, Financial Support and Work Guidance mostly open 8.00 to 8.00 but check the link.

Might be a good starting place to have a look at this great paper.

At times, living the post cancer journey is like living in a parallel universe - you can see your old life but regardless what you do you can not get back on that same path.

Following my many years of treatment and now nearly 4 years into my post treatment life, a situation I was unwillingly put into. It did actually make me review life and everything that we once thought important.

So some things from our old life are still in our lives but various aspects of our old life that were once seen as important were put in the bin and we don’t miss them.

Thanks Highlander

I've already been doing the school run and had a million questions and even someone said what's wrong with your mouth? There and then I wanted to vanish, smack her in the mouth (I'm not a violent person) and just put her in her place. So I said I had cancer. How was your summer? She just stood there and said nothing. I feel bad but why should I explain myself to everyone.

I've already found myself dismissing things I once thought important but now it's just not! 

I will look into the paper and groups you've suggested. 

Thank you x

Thanks Mike for adding to what I said and for  posting that paper.

It's really worth a read, Red Mother 1. Well done for simply saying "I've had cancer n how was your summer?"Bet that shut her up! As u said, why should u explain yourself to all n sundry.

Honestly, this site either doesn't save what I post or posts it twice!! Sorry

buttercup01

Lol, when you hit the blue post button, take a breath before you hit the button again - if the button has not changed colour to green and the blue bar has completed it run across the top of the page it is not posting.

When stuff disappears the site has lost it’s connection, frustrating but this happens from time to time.

When I am doing long posts I use the ‘notes’ section on my phone/computer then copy and paste so reduces the problem of lost stuff.

You can go into ‘more’ at the bottom of ‘your’ posts and delete doubles xx

Red mother 1

Unfortunately this happens all the time, the best way to handle folks is just say it as it is - tell the true. They may never talk to you again or can communicate with understanding.

Keep posting as we do understand.

Thanks Highlander

It's hard to talk to my partner and family about this all. He feels guilty and lost for what to say. My mum just cries and I feel her pity and sadness when I talk to her. My dad thinks I'm so strong so I feel I can't show any weakness to him (difficult relationship anyway lol)

This has helped me a lot. Talking with you both