What to wear and how.

Hi there! 

I'm in my early 60s so gone are the days of skimpy clothes stoma or no stoma! I tend to go for high waisted jeans that are stretchy .( the only time I had an embarrassing leak was wearing non stretchy jeans and letting the bag get a little too full) i like to wear tunic tops that hang loosely over my middle, I'm quite tall so these suit me anyway. I have one or two waisted dresses which I think show my bag a bit,but quite honestly I don't think anyone else notices. I tend to empty my bag as frequently as I can if I'm wearing them. I have some nice loose summer dresses where you really can't see the bag. 

As for swimming costumes I think a  busy pattern can hide a bulge, and rouched tummy area hides a bulge quite well. 

I've had my stoma for 6 years now, I promise you will find your own solutions. 

Catherine  xxxx

I’m a lover of tunic tops too.They are comfy and the bag is easily covered.I have a urostomy.Jane x

Hi Zebra,

Like Springtimegirl, I wear high waisted bottoms that have some stretch in as I find them comfortable and practical and usually with a top that covers my waist. 
There are specialist clothing places I’ve seen online but I’ve always managed to find what I need on the high street. They may be worth looking at for serious swimwear. I swim a bit but am mainly in the pool for aqua aerobics. I wear a swimsuit with a tummy control panel and a shape wear thong underneath. I feel quite comfortable and confident with this combination. 
It might take a while and some experimentation but I’m sure you’ll find your new style! Good luck. 

Hi Zebra,

I have two permament stomas. Totally agree with the Sprintimegirl's comment about busy pattern on a swimming costume - I have two 'busy' patterns and both you cannot see the stomas.

I don't think I'm much help on the tops....my stomas are quite high (my temporary stoma was much lower). So I wear low/mid trousers, and the stoma bag goes partially over my belt. I wear loose blouses/shirts which are long enough to cover stoma bags...I go for sort of cotton material (not clingy jersey material) which hides them both well. I don't wear t-shirt material. 

On dresses, I go for waist band/gather just under my chest with quite full skirts....the material then below the high waist band falls such that you don't see the stoma bags. Again, I do find patterns are best, not a flat colour. I did try dresses with a normal waist band but doesn't work for me....the high (just under your chest) waist works a treat for me. 

It takes a while to figure things out, I'm still learning, but you do find your 'normal'. Last thing I would say, is people are actually remarkably unobservant....you may be worried about something, but others won't even notice. Wishing you all the best! 

Hello Catherine,  thank you for your reply and very helpful suggestions.  I am sure I will find out what works and what doesn't - it's just that it's all so new.  Zebra xxx

Thank you for your reply and useful suggestions.  The advice regarding the swim wear is very helpful.  As you say, in time I will find my way.  Zebra xxx

Hi Babotie.  It's interesting that the answers to my question seem to focus on patterned swim wear and dresses.  Also that I may be paying too much attention to what I look like to other people.  You're all quite right - I don't find myself being critical of others' choice of clothes so why should anyone care about mine   It's early days - I'll get there.  Thank you so much for your reply.  Zebra xxx

Hello Jane,  Thank you for your reply.  Seems that tunic tops may be the way to go.  Zebra xxx

Hi Zebra,I think comfort is the most important.You will find your style and what works with your stoma.I went through all my clothes post op and didn’t get rid of much.I tend to avoid clingy fabric and wear more patterns than before.No one can tell I have a stoma.I wouldn’t mind if they did notice as it’s saved my life but it’s never been commented on.Love Jane xx

Quite agree. Nobody has ever noticed my Urostomy. I don't wear dresses at all or skirts except rarely in summer and as for tights - never again!. I haven't bothered since I retired and even before then it was trouser suits towards the end.

I try and get loose waistlines just because they can drag on the stoma if too close to it. And that can be uncomfortable. I favour well made trousers if going out, or gym wear for exercise or at home.

My M&S stoma pants hold things together very well so that's not a problem. if I were to bother being smart I might try a longer length dress that skims hips and bust. Or a similar-shaped longer tunic over flowing trousers. I'd go for a single colour - bright or black. 

Otherwise my motto has always been wear what is comfortable and people will focus on your smiling face not other parts of your anatomy.

In fact my main problem is shoes. Every day, if I can, I wear my comfortable hill walking shoes (men's, broad, size 8) with orthotics to hold my feet properly. I walk a lot so these are very good. Otherwise I find women's shoes very painful to wear for any length of time. The immunotherapy treatment gave me peripheral neuropathy and the insoles, made by an excellent podiatrist, are on a base specially made for that problem. They also deal with other musculoskeletal problems that pre-date cancer.

7 weeks is very early in your journey. I promise that before you know it you will feel confident in whatever you choose to wear. There are many sites that sell stoma swimwear but again I would probably wear one of my old outfits although I haven't actually bothered with swimming in the last 3 years. Again the M&S pants would keep a good silhouette underneath I think. They have enough elastane to support a fairly full bag of urine, anyway. Plus there are always sarongs. 

Good luck and if you are off to a party enjoy it.

All the best,

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