Hey help for primary carer with parent and siblings

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I’m finding this group a bit hard to navigate so if someone could help me I’d be really grateful

i am the primary carer of my mum who’s being diagnosed with Pancreatic cancer spread to her Peritrineum

i’m struggling at the moment as I had to move home from London where I was in a very open queer space where gender, sexuality and mental health was openly discussed back into my teenage bedroom to look after my mum.

i obviously did this willingly and there was no other thought than to care for mum however we are now 6 cycles into chemo, mum is struggling with her mental health but thinks it’s a taboo subject and I’m also now in an environment where me doing the majority of the care is being accepted as ok by my mum and especially my brother because I don’t have children and that I can handle it due to to having less responsibilities and that men deal with emotions differently. 

Currently I’ve had to cut contact with my brother and minimise it with my sister as their response to me knowing my mental health is on the decline is to think I’m being overly emotional, this then affects my ability to care for mum as well as work and study myself .

id really appreciate anyones input into how to can cope with my mums mental health even though she thinks it’s not a thing and also how to deal with family members 

  • Hi and a warm welcome to the online community

    I'm very sorry to read that your mum has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer and how much of an effect caring for her has had on you.

    As you know the online community is divided up into support groups so I hope you don't mind me suggesting that you join the carers only group where you should find the support you're looking for.

    If you'd like to do this then clicking on the link I've created will take you straight there where you can join and post in the same way as you did here and join in with existing conversations by clicking on 'reply'.

    When you have a minute it would be great if you could pop something about your mum's  diagnosis and treatment so far into your profile as it really helps others when replying to you and also when looking for someone on a similar pathway. It also means that you don't have to keep repeating yourself. To do this click on your username and then select 'Profile'. You can amend it at any time and if you're not sure what to write you can take a look at mine by clicking on my username.

    If you have any difficulty navigating the community just drop me a reply and I'll be pleased to help

    x

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