hi susan and amanda, been having problems posting on the other post so thought i would carry on here and see if it works!! how has your weekend been? susan do things feel a little easier for you this year or not really? i feel so sorry for you having all those people around you last year when i bet all you wanted to do was run didnt you? its awful with christmas coming isnt it i even go shopping online as to not have to go shopping with all the xmas things about. i feel so selfish and bitter at the moment and dont want to, i can hear my mum saying come on karen dont be like that but its hard isnt it. i feel so lonely tonight i just want to talk and have a cuddle and a kiss with my mum, sometimes it really hits even harder doesnt it? speak to you both soon, and hope you are bearing up. we all need each other dont we? my love and thoughts are with you love karen xxxxx
How are you today?Thanks for your lovely message.Yep, I'm out the other side of my low now.I can totally relate to you not sleeping very well.I never have either, its horrible isnt it, makes you feel absolutely drained.What was worse was when I was working and just struggled through the day trying to concentrate on figures and everything, it was horrible.Then someone would come in and say something like ‘god you look terrible’ !!I used to say ‘well YOU try doing a full days work after having not slept properly for weeks on end’.I must admit I have been better since living here in Mum and dads house, I only get the odd occasion where I lay awake now.This house is so peaceful (until the woodpecker starts drilling his holes in the spinney !!).You sound like you have a very busy hectic life Marie.How many guinea pigs do you have?We used to have 2 when we were kids, although it was always poor old Mum who used to feed and clean them out.I suppose it’s the same for you.What are you up to this weekend, anything exciting?I hope you have a good one whatever you're doing.Speak later Marie, take care, love jayne xxx
I hope you're feeling a bit brighter today, and thanks for your message and hug.I really didn’t expect anyone to reply, I didn’t post it for that reason, I just needed to let off a bit of anger I suppose, but thank you.I know you have been feeling so rotten lately and I hope you can soon feel that the days will be better for you.Its horrible isnt it, when we think we’re doing ok and then all of a sudden we’re not.Like Susan says, its all part of the grief thing.I've never known anything like it before.I think I've said on an earlier post that I don’t ever remember feeling like this when I lost Dad.But this is all so different.Its something that you could never ever describe to anyone that hasn’t been through it isnt it?Some very strange and mixed emotions, I find it annoying because I'm usually in control but its like its something that you can't control isnt it?Weird really.That’s probably why I felt so angry yesterday, because its something out of my control.I suppose we just have to ‘go with the flow’ so to speak.Well done at ww, you're starting to make me feel even more of a slob now!!I hope you're having a better day Karen and you managed to get your appointment with the doc sorted out.Hope the weekend is good for you all.Please take care, and know that we are all here for you, speak soon, love jayne xxx
How are you?I've been thinking about you a lot.I hope today is better for you.We will all get through this, no matter how long it takes.Its not going to beat us, although some days it knocks us back, we stand up again and will carry on until we’re back to feeling somehow better.Nothing is going to make us the people we used to be because we have all changed.Our lives have changed so much, but we are all going to be stronger and better people for everything we are having to cope with now.I hope you come back soon Louise, we miss you.Sending you lots of love, jayne xxx
How are you all?Thinking about you and hoping everything is going ok for you.Take care, love jayne xxx
Hi Liz
How is everything with you now?Have you had a better week?Thinking of you, take care, love jayne xxx
Hi Jodi
How are you? I hope everything is ok. Please let us know how things are with you now. Just to let you know that I'm thinking about you and hoping the days ahead get better for you. Take care, love jayne xxx
I just read what you said on the other post about your brother. I think thats why i felt so angry yesterday. My brother never did send us an anniversary card last week, i thought maybe he forgot, but he NEVER sent my hubby a birthday card either, so now we are thinking that they dont want to know us at all. It really hurts because we used to be so close. Im not going to let him know that it bothers me though, so just get on with it i suppose. Maybe he did forget, but its the first time ever if he did. Dont know what to think. see you soon, jayne xxx
Hi Jayne-- nothing exciting planned for the weekend,sadly.Just the usual boring food shop tomorrow!!!
we have 2 guinea pigs.both female.One is about 5 and the other 4 1/2 . they absolutely hate each other!! which is quite amusing, but they've learned to come to a slight level of tolerance.We have them in a big cage with a large run underneath so they can avoid each other pretty much!!! They're a right pair though,they won't use the ladder that takes them from top to bottom of cage,so i have to go out and lift them up and down!!! I've tried everything.Ive put food on the ladder,ive pushed them up and down it myself,but theyre having none of it!!! Its been well over a year and they positively WILL NOT use the ladder!!!!
I should go out there and clean it out today,but its cold and a bit wet,and i'm not keen although it will have to be done.A job for the weekend i guess.
Hope that you have a lovely weekend. A bit of sunshine will work wonders for all of us i think.see you soon,marie XXXXXX
I'm pleased you are feeling better today. Good luck with the job interview on monday. Your budgie sounds lovely, mine doesn't talk I think he was a bit too old when I got him. I was thinking of getting another but the pet shop has stopped selling all sorts of birdsdon't quite know why so I don't know where to get anymore from. I think thats really sad about your brother not sending you an anniversary card or your hubby a birthday card. Although as you know I have many issues with my brother but I wouldn't stop sending him or his wife and stepchildren birthday cards I just think thats really mean. Things are the same with me each day seems to be a worse struggle than the one before at the moment. Its strange as I was trying to think what mum was like before she first became ill and I find I can't all I can think is what she is like now and it really hurts, maybe in time I will get past that I don't know. I'm struggling to think what the point to anything is at the moment. I just feel so low at the moment and don't really know what to do. I got very drunk last night which probably hasn't helped my mood one bit but I just wanted to block everything out for a while. Anyway I hope you have a relaxing evening and a good weekend take care lots of love Sharon xxxx
How are you doing today. I'm pleased your old house is now sorted one less thing to worry about. Did you manage to see the doctor today. Things are just the same with me feeling really low. I just wish I could wake up and this nightmare be gone but I know thats never going to happen. I am thinking of you and hoping you have a good weekend lots of love Sharon xxx
I hope you are having an ok day. You sound like you have a really busy life, I don't know how you do it. You are right that we have to keep on going and not give up, although sometimes it is so hard to see past the dark days. I am just finding it really hard at the moment to stay strong for mum when I feel so down myself. As I was saying to Jayne I find it really hard to remember what mum was like before she was first ill, all I can think of what she is like now, I don't know why. I imagine you have got a busy weekend ahead. Take care lots of love Sharon xxx
