BOB JK My diary of kidney cancer (to be continued)
FormerMember
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Hi, My name is Bob and I live in Cambridgeshire. I am married with an 8 yr old daughter and three older step sons. Up untill the end of last year everything was tickety boo having recently moved to a new house which we love. Work was busy but enjoyable. I am Manager of an electrical companys maintenance department and my Wife, Linda was enjoying her job as a Nurse. The three boys are buying there own house nearby and all work locally. In November I went to my Doctors with a small "cyst" on my chest. After a couple of referals and many Xrays, pet scans, bone scans and CT scans I was told the news everybody dreads. My lump on the chest was a secondary cancer of which the primary was in my left Kidney. I was fast tracked to the Royal Brompton, under the expert care of Mr Laddas who informed a long and complicated operation would need to be carried out to remove the bone tumor and surrounding bone which involved two ribs,my collar bone and chest bone. I did not have time to panic, the operation was carried out the next day over 10 hrs. After nearly two weeks in the Brompton I am recovering well from this op but I have since been told that the Cancer is in both kidneys as well as small mets in both lungs. It seems at the moment further ops are out the question and i have been put on the drug Sutent. I am one week into this and so far so good. I do not know what the future holds but I have to remain positive.
Thats a good idea Kate, what a way to travel on the A14.
Today has been better again.After a really good nights sleep, we awoke and I managed a piece of toast. The morning was spent waiting for the quick fit fitters to change our wheel, sounds good, waiting for a quick fit fitter, could not have been that quick or else we would not have been waiting lol. He did turn up though and ended up changing both rear tyres, im glad motobility were paying. I managed a small ready meal for lunch after which Tom and Katie came over. We took our Kate to meet a friend to go swimming before us four left went to visit Wimpole hall. Again I used an electric buggy and did not venture as far as the A14 but did pretty good around the grounds. we must have covered a good three miles and we all really enjoyed it. The weather has been better than predicted with rain only falling throughout the night so far. Once home we decided to get a Chinese takeaway for tea, and i faired pretty good. spare ribs, noodles and chicken, and so far it has all stayed in tact. Once back home, Tom cut my grass whilst I trimmed up the edges. All in all a really good day.
Kate has had a bad run the last couple of days and she keeps a feelings book which she has been filling in regularly. Today she has had a bit better day and she showed me her drawings and writing for today, the one that hit me between the eyes was that she had written " I want my daddy to live". How heart breaking is that. A father should be able to fix things for his little girl but this is one thing I cannot fix and have no control over. Also Linda speaks of her fears about the future. We are not being pessimistic. but know that ill need all the luck in the world to survive for any amount of time. I still have hope and am generally positive but am also a realist who has to keep his feet on the ground. Thats my way of dealing with things. Hopefully Tomorrow we will have another sunny day as I think we are taking Kate and a friend to a fair.
And I am sending you all that luck in the world dear Bob, Kate and Linda and so many warm (((((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))) to you all,
Glad to hear today has been good, tomorrow will be even better love, I am praying for that.
Sir Bob, I too have been hit a bit, maybe its the sudden change in the weather, lol! But we all have down times, your dearest family members are not alone, but that gives little comfort, does it? Someone recently said to me 'we are all going to die, we just don't know when.....a cancer diagnosis doesn't change that, we still don't know when'
But the thoughts of our loved ones dying still hurts, even though they are still with us at the time, there is no logic to the way our minds work, is there?
Well, philosophical thoughts still don't help, so I will just send you my love and comforting hugs for you and your family
A fair day today in as much we took Kate and a friend to a fair which my sister was helping to organise. Kate had a great time and really looked relaxed and having fun like a ten year old should. I was okish at the start of the day but am totally done in now. I felt really cold but did manage to drag myself around with the help of a walking stick. I managed a bit of toast for breakfast, tried to eat lunch but it tasted horrible. Also tried tea and managed a small amount.My taste buds are shot to bits and I feel shot to bits. I hope and pray I get over this but cant help but wonder if my luck is running out. I honestly feel as if my life is draining from my body and I hate it.
I haven't written on your forum for quite a while however, I just wanted to tell you that my husband, David, had radiotherapy some months ago and could barely lift his head off his chest a couple of weeks after he had stopped receiving it.
If he is anything to go by then the effects do improve after a while. I hope they do for you too.
Sending you the warmest of ((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs))))))))))))))))))))))))))) don't give up love, you are bigger then this bloody disease, keep on fighting. My prayers and healing vibes are with you tonight and I am sending you my strength, just hope it works for you love.
(((((((((((((((((((((((((((((hugs for little Kate))))))))))))))))))))))))) and so many warm (((((((((hugs)))))))))) for dear Linda.
Sir Bob, it WAS cold yesterday, so I'm not surprised you felt it.......the weather has changed quite a bit since last week, I wore a jumper and a windproof jacket yesterday and needed them!
Hope you feel better today, love and big hugs for you and the family......
You never cease to amaze me with your determination to fight this cruel disease.
Sadly for my husband his fight is coming to an end. I feel so sad that he was unable to resume treatment on the sunitinib after his operation in December, due to the slow recovery he was making. This was down to the fact that the cancer had already spread to his brain. The long break gave the cancer a chance to become active again and following his scans in February, it was deemed that he was too weak to endure the side effects of further treatment. All I can do is sit & watch, as he spends most of his days in bed, now unable to enjoy the outdoors that he loved so much. He's been having longer spells asleep, not wanting to eat & sometimes barely having the strength to move. He had been a fit & healthy 51 year old, who hardly had anytime off sick from work.
So, when I read your blogs and all the things you are still able to do, sad though it may be in our case, it gives me hope that others can go on fighting for many years. May your fight continue for a good while yet.
