Well here i am again at 4.30 in the morning and i can't sleep yet again!! My husband Darryl has terminal small cell cancer and, at the moment is going through a really good phase. Which, i would have thought, would set my mind at rest and enable me to sleep. But no, here i am again having had 2 hrs sleep tonight wide awake with mad thoughts running around my head!! This is driving me crazy and i just seem to be on auto pilot all the time. Darryl is 44 years old and we have been given a prognosis of a 2-3 year life span for him. I can't seem to let go of this thought, and maybe part of me can't sleep because of that, as i feel if i'm asleep i'm wasteing precious time!! Darryl is sound asleep and resting well, and if i stay upstairs next to him listening to his breathing, i keep thinking is this the last time i'll ever hear that and end up getting so uptight and worried that i find it better to just get up again. So i wander round the house do a few chores, have a hot caffiene free drink and will myself to sleep all to no avail i might add!! hahaha surely i'm not the only carer who never sleeps, or am i????? any comments gratefully recieved. Take care my friends and hope your all sleeping well. love and hugs mel xxx
Hello all my chickies i hope you and your loved ones are all well and sleeping well? Daz wanted to go for a walk today in a park near us s off we went. We drove to the park as too far for daz to walk to, and arrived at 6pm. We were back in the car at 6.15pm! That was a short walk wasn't it? lol I think daz is trying to run before he can walk if you excuse the pun! On the way home he wanted to go see his mum so i drove him to there and we was only in there 10 minutes and daz wanted to go back home. He came home and had a sleep and felt a bit better after. He has eaten a little more than yesterday and still drinking well so good news on that front. The OT lady came out today and has put a wheelchair on order for daz and getting us a board for the bath and a bannister up the stairs. She was really nice and said if we need more things in the future just to ring her and she will sort it all out for us. we've sorted the hall out now and we have it booked from 3pm til 11pm on sunday 27th july.We even have a private play area for the little ones to play in so they don't get bored and end up running around in the hall.My sisters are all helping to pay for the food and the cooking and are helping to decorate the hall on the day too. I thought i would invite paople from 7pm so we have 4 hrs on the day to set it all up. His boss Gary rang today to say he is coming over on thursday at 5pm to chat about whatt daz would like done in the garden. So that will be nice to get that finished for daz then he may sit out there more and have a nicer place to sit. Well that's my news for today i am about for a while yet if any of you are still awake and want a chat? I hope you are all well and if you are all asleep i hope you have sweet dreams and catch up with you all again when i can. Everyone here is saftly tucked up for the night and it's so quiet! lol Love and hugs MHM xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hi MHM Hope you are all ok, am pleased to hear that Daryll is eating and drinking a little more...a good sign eh? and the party sounds like a great idea, something to divert your thoughts for a while (if that makes sense) hope you know what I mean, I hope you had a good weekend, sending love and hugs to you all chickie T/MUS lol!! xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
hey my chickie MUS Teresa!! That still makes me smile!! lol Thanks babe it will be nice to focus on something nice for a change so i know what you mean no worries there. How are you and my baby chick Michaela tonight hope you're both ok? Love and hugs MHM xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hey MHM/CCC That makes me smile too lol!! We are ok, Michaela had an uncomfortable night last night as felt uncomfortable around her ribs, said she felt like she needed a good burp or fart!! such a lady is my baby!! she's been aching today and sleeping quite a bit and when not doing that she's been eating and being a right stroppy one!! makes ya feel so alone sometimes and I hate keep asking her if she's alright because she just snaps more, think yesterday took it out of her but I was so proud of her and we did have a laugh, if her levels don't drop any further mum is taking us away for 2days next week for a girlie get together, bless her, she needs a break too. How are Kirsty and Daley? and who have you got the bet on for the football, although not been watching it all I reckon it will be a Russia/Germany final or Spain actually? love and hugs to all your MUS/T xxxxxxxxxx
hey my chickie MUS Teresa! lol Glad you had a nice time yesterday! You did get around then? lol Not that i thought you wouldn't of course! ;) I'm sorry our baby chick has been uncomfortable maybe she does need a good fart after all!! lol Lovely lady she is eh? lol I said before the footie started that spain would win and i still think they could do it though Russia looking good too so you just never know eh? Darryl and Daley wanted Holland but i knew they wouldn't do so well! lol Well i didn't really was just guessing but i still stand by spain though! Good guess by me i think! lol Daley and Kirsty are ok thanks babe the're getting there slowly but looking forward to the party now too. That was nice of your mum to take you girls away for a couple of days do yo know where you will be going yet? Better take lots of money then cos i bet our baby chick will find lots of nice things to buy! lol I hope you do get to go as it will do you all good to get away for a bit. Love and hugs your CCC MHM XXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXXX
Hey CCC/dearest MHM I did think Spain could be in for the winning but I think now it's anyone's game? yesterday was nice as Michaela's Dads family done it with us as well and her cousin had a t-shirt made with a pic of Michaela on and her 2 friends names and my dad's name, we walked it in an hour and 6 mins though Michaela did struggle a bit but we made it and Angie and Mia (bless her) done it in 59mins (she even had a bit of a run!!) If we can get away next tues/wed we are going to Brighton ooh er lol!!
Glad that Daley and Kirsty are ok and I hope you are too? and will be thinking about you later today, lots of love and hugs your MUS/chickie T xxxxxxx (((((hugs)))))
hey my chickie MUS Teresa so our baby chick decided to do it in the end eh? Well done all of you and bless little Mia bet she slept well last night! Brighton eh? that will be nice iv'e been there loads of times with Daz and i love all the odd little shops very oldy worldy! At least they got shops there that you don't often see anywhere else so i know Michaela will find loads of really different things she will love so you better have big pockets! lol Funnily enough that was where me and my sister Trot was going for a weekend until daz got ill again so great minds think alike eh? Have you ever been to Brighton before? If you haven't you will love it! love and hugs MHM xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Hey dear MHM I don't know about big pockets needed, more like a suitcase comes to mind!! went there a few times as little one with mum and dad, they went there 2 years ago for the day and in the 'olden days' that's where they had their honeymoon, talk about splashing out lol!! Michaela was more than determined to do the race and had said all along that she wasn't doing it for herself but for her grandad and others that have it, bless her little ickle chickie heart, have you heard anything from Kate? love and hugs your MUS/chickie teresa xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
