Well here i am again at 4.30 in the morning and i can't sleep yet again!! My husband Darryl has terminal small cell cancer and, at the moment is going through a really good phase. Which, i would have thought, would set my mind at rest and enable me to sleep. But no, here i am again having had 2 hrs sleep tonight wide awake with mad thoughts running around my head!! This is driving me crazy and i just seem to be on auto pilot all the time. Darryl is 44 years old and we have been given a prognosis of a 2-3 year life span for him. I can't seem to let go of this thought, and maybe part of me can't sleep because of that, as i feel if i'm asleep i'm wasteing precious time!! Darryl is sound asleep and resting well, and if i stay upstairs next to him listening to his breathing, i keep thinking is this the last time i'll ever hear that and end up getting so uptight and worried that i find it better to just get up again. So i wander round the house do a few chores, have a hot caffiene free drink and will myself to sleep all to no avail i might add!! hahaha surely i'm not the only carer who never sleeps, or am i????? any comments gratefully recieved. Take care my friends and hope your all sleeping well. love and hugs mel xxx
Hey chicks i am back Straight jackets on Karen you didnt have to spray starch it ha ha, Now listen here Teresa chick, nothing has been confirmed about chikky Michaela, so stop that frettin till you have any results ok, sorry babes dont want to sound bossy but dont want you anymore down till we all know ok? we will all give you a leg up over any hurdle you face ok? but babes maybes your worrying is unfounded ok? Think you are worn out and not supriseing, I will stay up all night with you but if you are dozeing in the chair then maybe your bodys tellin you to rest? Karen chick well a bottle blonde ha ha let it all out tonight didnt ya lol, actually im a "nice an easy does it everytime" brunette with a few bottle blond highlites who am I to talk ha ha Teresa babes sad you have had a cry but happy too if that makes sense? think grievin process is now kickin in properly and surely that is good isnt it ? you will soon both be lookin back to happy memories instead of pain, shame the party disappeared was it somethin I said ha ha, nice to meet you Haley and Lynne " we l meet again" gone all vera lynne now
how u doin vera lynne? think teresa fell asleep somewhere bless her. anyway mate i'm knackered so gonna try and get some sleep, its nothing you done really lol hee hee, speak tomorrow, hope you get some sleep too.
teresa, hope you get some news tomorrow hun, lots of love to michaela, hope you get some sleep, thinking about you, speak tomorrow,
lots of love, hugs, easter eggs, frankfurters, bananas, postman pat, firemen with hoses (hope so lol) and wearing pinnies, eggy bread and mushrooms, breakfast baguettes, fruit pastilles, HUGE marrows, brussels, (aint got the energy to add any more now lol) oh yeah and straight jacket for our looney kate, love you all karen xxxx
Hi darlings chicks cos that what you are!! Im not fretting too much just a worrying time so soon after everything else and its like I said to mum today when she stays at friends houses or her dads I dont mind being on my own in the week it just feels weird her being in hospital dont think im allowed back up there till normal visit hours tomorrow (today) besides I have to go into town as it Angies birthday on friday so need to get cards and pressies!! and going to the baby section of all shops I go in so I can spoil Samuel!! and easter eggs for Mia!! Up for a while loger, 1 more cuppa then bed I think... hope all alright with our mother hen mel? lots of love and hugs T xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
Night night little easter chick, Hope teresa is haveing sweet dreams, I am cross eyed Im only up cos thought Teresa may need us but the little chick must be goosed like mother hen ha ha, night night chicky Karen i too am off to bed too sweet dreams babe luv cross eyed Kate, wearing a straight jacket singin vera lynne and sister sledge songs, gettin kicked out of school, now no replys im too tired to retaliate ha ha xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
chicky teresa i hope you manage to get a bit of sleep, and of course its such a worrying time for you hunni, esp on top of everything else. hope michaela feels better when you see her. happy shopping for baby clothes, and hope angie feeling better soon too. lots of love and hugs, please let us know how things are tomorrow (well later on) love karen xxx
nite nite my fellow chicks , teresa and (cross eyed kate) sleep tight!! hope your having lovely dreams mama hen mel, bet there of firemen and there hoses lol luv ya all karen xxxxxxxxx
Bless you two that you stayed up on my behalf (whenever you need it I'l do the same, feels like I have a lot to repay!!), having 1 more cuppa then bed, lots and lots of love and hugs to you both T xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
