Well here i am again at 4.30 in the morning and i can't sleep yet again!! My husband Darryl has terminal small cell cancer and, at the moment is going through a really good phase. Which, i would have thought, would set my mind at rest and enable me to sleep. But no, here i am again having had 2 hrs sleep tonight wide awake with mad thoughts running around my head!! This is driving me crazy and i just seem to be on auto pilot all the time. Darryl is 44 years old and we have been given a prognosis of a 2-3 year life span for him. I can't seem to let go of this thought, and maybe part of me can't sleep because of that, as i feel if i'm asleep i'm wasteing precious time!! Darryl is sound asleep and resting well, and if i stay upstairs next to him listening to his breathing, i keep thinking is this the last time i'll ever hear that and end up getting so uptight and worried that i find it better to just get up again. So i wander round the house do a few chores, have a hot caffiene free drink and will myself to sleep all to no avail i might add!! hahaha surely i'm not the only carer who never sleeps, or am i????? any comments gratefully recieved. Take care my friends and hope your all sleeping well. love and hugs mel xxx
Did you have your night out tonight or are you saving that for tomorrow?? whatever night it is or was hunni I hope you enjoyed yourself (you deserve it babe!!) love n hugs Teresa xxxxxxx
lol sowwi, had a good nite tonight th lol. wasnt meant to be drinking but ya know was feeling pretty lw went for a walk n ended up at the shop, next thing i knew i had a few bottles in my hand hahahaha!!!! love ya all xoxoxx
Dear MHM when you said about leaving the important one out me thinking that you were warming to MU but you were on about the S part eh??!! you ole CCC (jesting) love ya lots even if you don't have certain standards lol!! ((((hugs)))) and love your MUS chickie xxxxxxx
hey chickie Teresa I can't leave the S part out babe that's the important bit!! lol Besides i have to put up with the CCC so if it's good enough for me then it's good enough for you too you MUS!!! lol Told you Spain would be in the final though didn't i? lol Had me premonition head on then still think thye may win it though Should have put a bet on that shame really Love and hugs your CCC MHM xxxxxxxxxxxxx
hey my chickie Shell Daz not too bad thanks hun his temp has gone back down to 37.3c so thats good just settled him in bed so hopefully he will sleep till the morning. He still has kidney pain but chickie Teresa was saying that may be side effects of the CAV chemo daz on as her baby chick Michaela on the same chemo and gets back pain too. Love and hugs MHM xxxxxxxxxxxxxx
hey chickies Teresa, shell lisa and kate if your still awake i'm gonna go now and make a cuppa then catch up with the programmes i recorded so will say night night for now hope you all sleep well and have sweet dreams Take care all of you Love you all loads Much love and big hugs your MHM xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
awww bless them, hope he is ok tomorrow hun, xoxoxox teresa hope micheala is ok hun. ok nite alland sweetdreams to u 2. spk 2 u all 2moro love, hugs and kisses shell xoxoxoxox
