Well here i am again at 4.30 in the morning and i can't sleep yet again!! My husband Darryl has terminal small cell cancer and, at the moment is going through a really good phase. Which, i would have thought, would set my mind at rest and enable me to sleep. But no, here i am again having had 2 hrs sleep tonight wide awake with mad thoughts running around my head!! This is driving me crazy and i just seem to be on auto pilot all the time. Darryl is 44 years old and we have been given a prognosis of a 2-3 year life span for him. I can't seem to let go of this thought, and maybe part of me can't sleep because of that, as i feel if i'm asleep i'm wasteing precious time!! Darryl is sound asleep and resting well, and if i stay upstairs next to him listening to his breathing, i keep thinking is this the last time i'll ever hear that and end up getting so uptight and worried that i find it better to just get up again. So i wander round the house do a few chores, have a hot caffiene free drink and will myself to sleep all to no avail i might add!! hahaha surely i'm not the only carer who never sleeps, or am i????? any comments gratefully recieved. Take care my friends and hope your all sleeping well. love and hugs mel xxx
hey chickie Dianne OI you woman!! lol I would never say you was thick just a little nutty like us all that's all! lol Love you lots you nutty lady! lol Love and hugs MHM xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
mhm, i think i shud get off here hun, am crying again just dont seem to be able to control it at the mo, and dont wnt to drag anyone down hun xoxoxoxox
hey chickie strawberry shortcake Don't go babe we love you stay and chat you don't bring us down honestly!! I understand if you really want to go but i am here for you as are my chickies so stay if you want to and chat if not i will talk to you tomorrow yeah? Love you and don't wanna force you to do anything you don't feel comfortable with i understand Love and hugs MHM xxxxxxxxxxxx
hey chickie strawberry shortcake You do not dampen the atmosphere no way! Talk to us sweet we may be able to help? It's ok to be sad and cry babe we wouldn't be human if we didn't eh? You are in a dark place and feeling sad and we want to help you sweet we love and care about yo very much so you talk to us eh? We may be a big nutty at times but we do care! lol Love you loads talk to your mumma hen love and hugs MHM xxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxxx
