We Talk Brain Tumours

I wait till cathi has responded, she is the artist and the clever one with words, I am the scientist and can come across as cold but together we have the strongest of friendships.  ***t as this disease has been it has made me understand the value of love and friendship, whether its close at hand or via forums. One day I am sure some of us will meet up in person.

Naomi, you have been the best daughter ever, your mum will realise this especially when your sister goes back, tho she may not admit it.  Your sister will be jealous of what you have shared with you dad, Although its an awful time its also incredibly special.  On top of all this your dad knows and is special to your children, I hope he lets go soon, if you are there its because he will want you there if not it will be because he knows you have done enough and he can pass without you.  You all remain in my thoughts and prayers.

I miss Martyn and Pete and worry about them. rubbish at remembering everyones names and this new way of posting doesnt help but you remain in my thoughts and prayers each evening.

Buttercup, oops Debs - you are a real inspiration, so funny but inspiring at the same time, and by the way the new photo is a stunner

love to all and thank you for all the support you provide, 

joanna xxx

My lovely, amazing dad lost his battle against this hideous disease earlier tonight. In the end, he died the way he would have wanted. My mum rang from the hospice to say he had started the dreaded death rattle (and I heard it on the phone, something I will never forget) and ten minutes later he was gone. I wasn't there and I will live with that regret forever but for the last 24 days he has been at the hospice I told him I loved him to the moon and back every day.

I feel numb with shock. I can't believe I will never touch him or smell him or talk to him ever again. This disease robbed him of everything - but it didn't take his dignity. He hid the fact he was in excruciating pain until the night my sister arrived and he had kissed her as he knew he would be sedated once he gave in to it. His bravery was inspirational. Twelve months ago he agreed to try the chemo and RT for his girls. We got a whole extra year with him. We said and did everything we needed to and that's something others don't have.

I hope now he is sitting in the sunshine somewhere, with a good pint of London Pride ale, in a body that doesn't let him down.

Daddy, I will miss you forever. You have been my hero, my best friend, my confidante and when there has been no-one else there has always been you. I will take the lessons you have taught me and pass them on to my own children. Save a seat for me dad and, until I see you again - I love you.xxxxx

Love and courage to all.

Thanks for being there. I couldn't have got through this without each and every one of you.

Naomi.xxxxx

Oh Naomi

My heart is breaking for you right now. Please know that there are so many thoughts of love and comfort coming your way right now.

You are an amazing, inspirational person and if I am able to do for my husband even half of what you have done for your father then I will take comfort from knowing that I have done my best. I hope you are able to see that you have been amazing and take some comfort in that.

I am sure your Dad is looking down on you now with immeasurable love and pride.

Well done for all you did for him. You really were an amazing daughter. That came through in every word you typed.

Thinking of you and sending love.

Pam

x

Dear, sweet Naomi.  I'm sorry that this has happened, but at the same time releived that your father's battle is over.  In spirit, he has won and he's flying free now.

Over these past few months we've shared this journey, I've watched you grow so much as a person.  This journey has changed you, I think, and for the better.  You have so much maturity, conviction, and compassion that you give strength both to your family, and to the rest of us here.

You're truly inspirational and you've worked wonders in supporting your father, your family, and all of the rest of us.

Don't worry that you weren't with your father at the end, you know in your heart that he most probably wouldn't have know you were there.  It's probably better that you didn't have to go through that moment, as you're emotionally strong enough to help your mother through the rest of the process.

You're amazing, Naomi.  Your father would be intensely proud of you.

Pam - thank you. I am sure you will be, the strength comes from a place you didn't even know existed until you have to call upon it.xx

Pete - thank you so much. You will never know how much that message has helped me. Lots of love to you and Ali. I am sorry to read of Ali's increasing confusion, it may be just a tweaking of her meds is all that is needed. Who knew I would be such an expert on brain tumours hey ..... oh, the irony.xx

Naomi, of course I am devastated at your loss, but you have been an exceptional support to your dad and your mum and have been the best sister anyone could have wished for.  Naturally you will be devastated at dad leaving you however the lessons you have learned over the last 12 months will really help you to be an even better mum. Join those of us already in the last carriage of this awful train, where we watch and support  our friends still on the s*** journey.  Be kind to yourself and remember if dad had wanted you  there at the end he would have made sure you were there.  He didn't want you, you had done enough so he left before you got there.  Look after yourself the next days and weeks will be tough, only fight the important battles.

Pete, its lovely to see you posting.  hope all is peaceful for you and Ali, big hugs and love to both

love and kind thoughts to everyone.

By the way I am blaming each and every one of you for the state of my liver, I can't possibly continue to raise a glass to each of you and your families so am going to restrict to one glass for everyone

Joanna xxx

Naomi,

I am so sorry to hear that you have lost your precious dad. Your parents love stays with you forever. Though you will never physically see him or hear him again, his love for you and you for him, plus the precious memorises you have of him are yours forever and will never leave you. I, like you, was not present with my dad when I lost him. It was the one day I had not visited him, and he died quietly in his sleep at night. However I did not feel guility as I had made the most of my dad and had said everything to him I needed to say. You have been a wonderful caring daughter to him and you were with him to make the most of his last year. Thinking of you and all your family.

Naomi,

I can only echo what others have said. So sorry that you have lost your wonderful dad but relieved that his battle is over and that he is at peace.  You weren't there at the very end but take strength from the fact that you have been there throughout and you both said your goodbyes. I think that you are amazing and I really don't know how you have managed to do so much for your mum and dad when you have your young family. You did him proud and I'm sure he knew it.

Shedding tears for you now and like your other friends on here I will raise a glass to you and look out for a twinkling star which will indicate that he is looking down and hopefully enjoying his beer.

Love and thoughts x Ange x

Dear Naomi

me too raising a glass to your dad. Sorry its late.

Can only reiterate what all your friends have shared with you tonight. You couldnt have done any more love. Its awful loosing your dad, your rock ,cant put it into words.

love and strength to you all in the coming days and weeks and months ahead.

love jmd xxxxx

Good luck to all on this site. x

Naomi,

I can only reiterate what all the others have said, I am so terribly sad for your loss but on the other hand releived that your precious father has had his release from this awful torment. I hope you reach a place of where thoughts of your amazing Dad make you smile instead of sad, but there is no timescale when it comes to grief.

Take comfort in knowing you did the absolute best for him and how lucky you were to have a father/grandfather like he was.

Peace be the journey Naomi's Dad (don't know his name sorry), whatever and wherever it may take you.

Pete I hope Ali's confusion is temporary or as someone else has suggested just a tweak needed in the meds.

I still have the blasted headache (hoping its hormonal, will give it a day or so more before contacting my nurse).

Love & Strength to all who want or need it xx