Hi everyone, I have joined because my mum who is 88 and has some other health issues had a CT scan that has shown a mass on her kidney with involvement of the colon and abdominal wall. She is tired with not much energy and has gone from 70kg last year to just 45kg now. She says she never feels hungry and has to force herself to eat and can only manage small meals. We have our first appointment with the urologist on Thursday and will know more after that. I have worked in care for 30 years and have been my mums paid carer since March, this will be my first time caring for family with cancer. My mum won't be a candidate for surgery and says she doesn't want lots of messing about or treatments that will make her feel worse than she does now. I'm thinking it will probably be palliative care at home for whatever time she has left, but no idea how long that will be until our appointment on Thursday or how fast mum will deteriorate. Any help or advice would be good, thank you.
Hi Trickster
Welcome to our community, I hope you find it both informative and supportive.
Sorry to hear about your mother, I know from some years ago how worrying it can be seeing a loved one losing weight so quickly as that happened with my wife some years ago. In her case it turned out to be an infection, pyometra, and ended up with her having an emergency hysterectomy. When she was in hospital they were feeding her ensure drinks and gave her a case load to bring home too.
One thing Janice never wanted was a prognosis and I struggled with that, in her case however she responded so much better to treatment than anyone expected with the doctors managing to make her cancer stable that I do not think any prognosis would have been helpful.
Something I had to learn in order to best support my wife was about looking after myself. It can be really difficult wathing a loved one go through this so I glad you have found us as together we can help share the load.
<<hugs>>
Steve
