Hello

Hey I can relate to your situation and definitely sharing the same feelings as you. Ive been quite shocked at how my friends have responded especially as I’m a shoulder to lean on in my group and honestly don't have them around to lean on but even if i did I wouldn’t really know what to say.
My younger brother was diagnosed with a stage 4 brain tumour and is currently on a clinical trial although he was given a short prognosis. I’m in my 30s and he’s only in his early 20s.

It’s hard having to accept and watch a loved one go through something like this. I’m learning to take one day at a time and though I’m grieving the life that I thought he would have and the life that we’d share. I have to remind myself that he is still here and that I should make the most of it. However, the anger, sadness and other times numbness is still there. The love I have for him and seeing him smile even if it’s once overcomes that for the period I am around him. I can’t recommend anything myself other than that as I’m in the same position as you but just wanted to let you know you’re not alone. I didn’t sleep at all last night so trying to find ways to calm my nervous system and release the anger and sadness. I keep telling myself I can’t be there for him if I’m not there for myself but worrying I’m slipping into a depression.