Reasonable work adjustments - struggling at work?

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Hi everyone,

We are in our 20s and recently found out my husbands cancer has come back. I'm totally terrified and struggling at work.

It helps to be busy but as soon as it comes to interacting with people, I find it frustrating to crack on as normal and my patience is thin. My social battery and brave face only seems to last about half the day, but no one really notices anyway.

Has anyone asked for adjustments or flexibility at work?

Work do offer a couple of days WFH a week, so I wondered about asking to work in the office for just mornings, working from home in afternoons, or having flexibility for more breaks etc.

For the MRI scans, I continued to work but it took me a full week to feel normal again after, but I know I can't just ask for time off every time we have an appointment! It's likely he might need an appointment monthly going forwards for blood tests.

Just wondered if anyone had any similar experiences? I feel like I'm overreacting but it can be really hard to face others at the moment.

Thanks in advance

Historyman 14 hours ago

I dont think you are overreacting at all, I have oesophageal cancer and can see the impact on my wife. Its hard, as people mean well and it gets tough having to keep everyone informed on how your partner is. Its exhausting and sometimes keeping everyone up to date takes its toll.

Regarding flexibility this is what found online:

you can legally request to work flexibly to care for your partner. Under UK law, you have a "Day One" statutory right to request flexible working, and you are protected from workplace discrimination based on your partner's illness. While employers are not legally required to guarantee a change, they must process requests reasonably and face strict legal standards if they choose to deny them.

Navigating a partner’s cancer diagnosis is incredibly demanding. The following breakdown outlines your specific employment rights and the clear steps you can take to adjust your working life.

Your Legal Rights as a Carer

Statutory Flexible Working Request: You have the right to request changes to your working hours, start/finish times, or work location (such as working from home) from your very first day of employment. You can make up to two formal requests within any 12-month period.

Protection from Associative Discrimination: Because cancer is automatically classified as a disability under the Equality Act 2010, you are legally protected from "associative discrimination". Your employer cannot pass you over for promotions, reduce your pay, penalise you, or treat you poorly simply because you are caring for someone with cancer.

Time Off for Dependants: You have a legal right to take a reasonable amount of unpaid time off work to handle emergencies involving your partner (e.g., sudden illnesses or unexpected care breakdowns). This does not cover planned hospital appointments, which should be managed via flexible working or standard leave.

I think that I would proceed by being upfront and honest about how you are feeling and how they can help yu navigate this period.

Hope this is useful and good luck

Regards

Richard

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Reasonable work adjustments - struggling at work?