My girlfriend, and to a lesser degree myself, begin a long journey today. We have 20+ weeks of combined chemo and surgery ahead of her. And that's just the beginning...
I think the overwhelming sense right now is that life will never be the same again as it was 4 weeks ago. Even if she gets great results from everything, there is going to be that on-going shadow that she will never know when it's going to come back.
If it does, when it does, what does she decide to do? What reserves will she have left to take it on again?
There's another medical condition where they used to talk about the shadow that is permanently with you. Sometimes it is in front of you and clearly visible. Sometimes behind you and for a while forgotten perhaps. But it is always with you. That it seems is her and our fate.
I cried yesterday as I haven't done for 30 years. Sobbed my heart out... for her, for us, and yes for me as well.
Hope the chemo went well. I was quite surprised when Janice had chemo how friendly the chemo suite was and had quite a few good sets of putting the world to rights while we were there. We were quite lucky in all her chemo sessions were fairly short while there were other people who were keep for pretty much the whole day.
<<hugs>>
Steve
