Hi all,
My nana has just been diagnosed with breast cancer not too long ago. It turns out that she had been hiding it for a long time probably as long as 6 years before she told anyone.
My Grandad is now taking care of her full-time however he had open heart surgery not too long ago either and is struggling to do all the things she needs by himself. Due to the stage that my Nan’s cancer is at she’s been deteriorating quickly and on Wednesday will have the palliative care team taking care of her.
I have a full-time job and would say I’m closer to my grandparents than even their own children so it’s really tough to see them have to deal with this by themselves while I’m still having to go to work. is there any advice the group could give as to how not feel guilty that my life goes on outside of my nans cancer, I want nothing more than to be there 24 seven and I’ve taken time off work to be able to help but it doesn’t feel like it’s enough. I’m constantly worried that the day I don’t go will be the last day she has, and honestly the concern I have for my Grandad’s health as well has been getting worse and worse.
It just feels like theres not been enough fast acting support out there to consider both their physical and mental wellbeing which is so sad to see.
any support or advice would be massively helpful, thank you.
Welcome to our community, I hope you find it both informative and supportive.
Sorry to hear about both your grandparents, I agree about the fast acting support bit though it is still worthwhile getting both a needs assessment and a carers assessment in place if they have not done this already.
My experience of cancer is via my wife who has Leiomyosarcoma, fortunatly after treatment her cancer is stable and has been that way for over 10 years now.
Something that helped me was looking at your feelings when someone has cancer as being able to recongize these feelings and accept them as normal and valid helped me feel less overwhelmed. Taking had really helped me, both on the helpline here 0808 808 0000 open 8am to 8pm and also the support I got from our local Maggies centre.
When I opened up at work about the cancer I found a number of colleagues who then came to me in a similar situation but had not talked to anyone before and then rather like the community we could help support each other.
<<hugs>>
Steve
