Husband seeing lung cancer surgeon tomorrow. I’m not coping!

Hi i was told i had lung and sec bone in end of Aug this year i am on my 2nd round of chemo,

There is so much i want to know but not sure where in here to post it, things like... how many chemos do you have,  why do they stop giving chemo? Or is the A down to the type of cancer.

Hi Helen

Seeing any doctor can be a stressful experience not knowing what will be said or what the future holds and our minds starts to play tricks and we imagine all sorts of scenarios which pushes our anxiety levels sky high.

At the meeting tomorrow you should make sure that you have a few pens with you and a note pad to jot down the responses you get. At anytime you don't understand what has just been said stop the doctor and ask if he could repeat using different words after all we are not medically trained and can't be expected to know all the medical jargon. The reason for taking notes is very simply you will no doubt be bombarded with information and you can't be expected to remember everything,  it is amazing how many people sit in the cars or at home saying what did say about this or I wish I had asked about this and are left wondering.

I have found the following for you

https://www.google.com/url?sa=t&source=web&rct=j&url=https://www.lungcancer.org/find_information/publications/163-lung_cancer_101/277-questions_to_ask&ved=2ahUKEwipn9D67dflAhWhQhUIHVFTBJwQFjACegQIAhAB&usg=AOvVaw0O_rym0LBy1_-bSvcuL9hc&cshid=1573121513140

which I hope will be of help to you, obviously all the questions may not be applicable to your husband and you can cherry pick the ones you think you need to ask.

Good luck to your husband for tomorrow and at some time maybe you could come back here and let us know how you got on

Best wishes 

Ian

By clicking on the green text above will open up a new page for you.

Thank you so much Ian, I really appreciate it. I’ll take a look at the link & will definitely take a notebook & pen. I put everything my husband gets given in a file for reference. Best wishes Helen

Hi r mondo, I’m sorry that I can’t help with your question, it’s all new to me too. I just wanted to send you my best wishes & wish you good luck with your treatment. 

My husband has lung cancer too! Try to listen to everything they say and make notes! Ask for time to digest it all! My husband was not given options, only told this is the treatment and side effects, sign here! I had read a lot as I am a nurse! 
As a result he was rushed, turned to drink and was too drunk to start his treatment! He didn’t really understand everything and needed time to think and digest it all as it is a huge shock! We now have to go back to the consultant! 
My advice would be to read what you can, make a list of questions and not to be rushed! It is a huge decision!!! 
good luck and take care xxx

Hi Akela2516. So sorry that your husband also has lung cancer! You’re definitely right with it being a huge shock. We’re still trying to get our heads around it & feel as though we’re caught up in a parallel world. 

We’ve made a list of questions to ask the surgeon tomorrow so hopefully things may be a bit clearer then. 

My very best wishes to you. Good luck with the consultant hopefully everything works out better this time. Look after yourself & thank you again for replying xxx

Hope all goes well for you today xxx

Good afternoon Helen.  Your post particularly caught me attention, and I feel for you. I am new to this site by only a few days. My husband also has recently (4 or 5 months), been diagnosed with Lung cancer Stage 4 with secondary brain tumour. I am 23yrs his junior and really struggling to cope with the severity of this situation. He has had a one off zapping of the brain tumour in the hope to control it, and on Monday starts his chemotherapy, we are told 5.5 hour session every 3 weeks for 4 sessions. We were not given options, just told this is what is going to happen. I didn't ask enough at the time of consultation but I have since spoken to the Specialist Nurse, and she has been fabulous. Explaining all my questions honestly and suggesting counselling and relaxation therapy for me as my husbands carer.  It is very much a roller coaster of emotions, but I hope you are offered as much information as is possible. I have read, read and re-read booklets and articles about my husbands situation and this site has given me  confidence to try to talk about it with others. You, like me, will have lots of questions for quite awhile, people here always seem to have time to listen. Good luck today, will be interested to see how you get on. Hugs. X

Wow, your story is so similar! We too felt bull dozed! No options, just this is what you are going to do!!! I want my husband to have the remainder of his life with a quality of life even if shorter! Not to be a continuous round of cycles of treatment being ill and constantly in and out of hospital, visits and appointments!! I also read loads and was frowned on but both as someone with intelligence and an enquiring mind and a nurse with 35 years experience that is what I do! 
we have another appointment now! I am going to speak out too! Popular or not!!! 
Hope all goes well for you both xxx

Thankyou so much. I appreciate your reply. It doesn't matter if you are popular or not, speak up hun, I'm sure they want us to really it's just that nobody seems to have the time to explain everything I suppose, unless we ask. 

Let us know how you get on, good luck. Xx