Devastated

Hi and welcome to the online community and I'm very sorry that you've had to join us this really is a place that no one wants to come to but you've found us and reached out to us and I hope we can be of help and support to you.

You say your dad has just been diagnosed have the medics discussed with him a treatment plan as yet. Bowel cancer is treatable and before giving up on him wait for the treatment plan to be finalised but one thing we all know waiting is a nightmare and seems to go on for ages but it will soon pass.

Many people have had bowel cancer and lived to a ripe old age and there is a very good chance that grandad will be around for a very long time to babysit and spoil your children.

You might find some benefit in joining our Bowel (colon and rectal) cancer forum group and introducing yourself to the amazing people over there they are very supportive of each other and eager to share their experiences with you and at the same time give to help, support and advice as they have all been in your shoes at sometimes either as a patient or a relative.

I want to tag my friend court into this conversation as she has a wealth of knowledge on the subject having looked after her mother for many years and will give you some inspiration.

Getting news of the diagnosis is always unfair and we all get pe_d off but take every day one at a time and don't assume the worst and don't Google anything if you need to know something  come on to the bowel group and get information from the people that know.

Looking to the future it could be that your dad will have a stoma for a short time and we can help you and your dad in our sister group Ileostomy, colostomy, urostomy and any other stoma support group but that at this stage can be for another day.

Do join us over in the Bowel (colon and rectal) cancer forum group and let us support you with all your qquestions.

I look forward to seeing you over there but please keep in touch with us we have the expertise to help you through the early days and beyond.

Ian

Hi ,

A big welcome from me too . Sorry to hear about your dad . I see you have found your way over to the Bowel thread which is great to see .

Bowel cancer is very well treated if caught at an early stage . Unless the surgeon has mentioned otherwise they will complete all the scanning protocol and come up with an individual treatment plan for him . 

Even in more advanced situations some people still respond very well to treatment and continue to live a very productive life . My mum had a spread to her liver and diagnosis at 67 . She was fit and strong in all other regards and is still here at 77 to celebrate her tenth year anniversary of a stage 4 diagnosis. She has invested a lot of that time imputing into her grandchildren.

There is so much that can be done so I would maybe keep an open mind till you see the treatment options and how he gets on with them .

You sound as though you have a special relationship and that’s a lot to fight for .

Surround him with love and take very good care of yourself too as he needs you well and strong .

take care ,

Court 

Thanks court for the backup as has found her way over to the bowel group hopefully, we can with the help of others, make the journey with her dad as smooth as possible with a good outcome. 

Many thanks again

Ian

Thanks for all the replies. He's in stage 4 at the moment, radio and surgery next week, stoma for at least 5 weeks so thanks for the redirect to that group.

Think the main fear is coming from having lost his mum to it when i was a teen, was very close to her too, and he also lost his grandad to it at about the same age. 

Great you found us . Hopefully we can ease this difficult time for you . 

Fear is a horrible thing but hopefully it will diminish a little if you see him making progress . I was full of fear at the beginning . But it did get a bit easier .

take care,

Court