Having a bad day

Some days things are just kind of pointless feeling aren't they?

We want to just be left alone curled up in our own dark place for a while please. ..but the routine of life won't let us.

I woke realising only Mum knew certain  things about me. 

..today is going to be several hours at hospital with Dad.

Hope your day can be coped with and you feel better.

Hug.

Jx

e&j - treadmill, all of it, responsibility, love, hurt, realisation. Not much for us heh although Jenny of course yr pops is here still so you are in a twixt. Sorry its like this. Im so very stuck but stuck not of my making. Partner on a work mission. Me, i want to retire and breathe. i actually feel incredibly lonely. Human contact is of wrong kind. I want mums hands on my face, i always belonged in that moment. X

Jenny re yr mum knowing certain things, i understand. My old counsellor also knows my 'things'. Its not the same but it does matter. I never really realised how close mum and i were, until the last year. I wanted to please her. Whatever I cld do I did. Did i do enough. Its a vicious circle of my Wurlitzer brain!

e, today take all breaks you can, go outside alone and breathe very deeply to have silence. Silence scares me but i crave it x

I kept myself very busy today so managed to get through the day.  I know what you mean about silence.  It can be scary but sometimes you/we need it.

Hope everyone is ok.

X

I've  been  in bed most of the day. Just feel worn out, like an old car tyre. I had a call from Cruse today. I start one to one counselling  next Thursday. 

Sue xx

Good luck with cruse sue it really helped me , hard work but I gained some peace and clarity at the end of my sessions

Really busy at work at the moment 13/14 hour days in the restaurant but came home tonight to a belated birthday gift from a close friend... a beautiful framed artwork of flowers and butterflies surrounding a pink capital J with the words "Because someone we love is in heaven, there is a little bit of heaven in our home" 

Made me smile, shed a tear and take a deep breath, very touched....some people are very thoughtful we must surround ourselves with those people and steer clear of the others 

Hope all are ok 

Oh Sue, sending you a big hug.  I hope the counselling helps.

What a lovely present Yantibee.  Yes, some are thoughtful and others show their true colours...  Which is a shame and sometimes surprising, shocking even.

Anyway, off to work feeling a bit better about things today.  Looked at mum's house this morning and felt ok. Different day, different ability to cope I suppose.

Hugs to all.

X

Oh Yantibee. Beaut pressie. How perfectly gifted. Indeed the steering clear is the hard bit for me. I always frar its me they want to steer clear of as Im honest but hopefully not blunt. 

Sue, do hope Cruse helps as much as with others and that today you are able to see some light.

Elenium and Jenny - how different emotionally one day can be to the next. Yr smiles are etched in my brain and yr encouragement from you both and others is invaluable. Just need to find my internal acceptance again.

Bobles, how are you and MIL?

think of you all everyday, may at times be brief but think I do

x

Hello,

Still following, though feeling quiet. All of your posts are so beautiful and heartfelt, I often feel moved to tears. I recogniise your struggles and don't really know what to say...Just be kind to yourselves, and allow yourselves to feel, there is no right or wrong way to be. Glad your meeting at the cathedral went well, it sounds wonderful. I find comfort in your posts, as I struggle with my own issues, not least supporting my Dad as he struggles with his bowel cancer. His quality of life is not great, and his mood is low, so it makes visits difficult. Anyway, I wish you all as well as you can be.

Take care, Anneteresa