Lack of empathy.

Maybe he is finding it difficult to express  how he feels ,partners can feel lost,angry and don't know how to cope ,he may need counselling himself,  try talking to him about he feels explain how hard it is for partners .he may be worried about money etc .tty keep it friendly. He may be grieving for the loss of life before cancer 

You sound like you support your daughter well  .hope this helps.

He is completely lost with his feeling so does not know of how to support her. Seeing her like that is too difficult. My husband was very supportive but was lost with simple things like walking zombie.. I had to pull all out of him and I was advising how to cook what to do first. Some day I screamed and shouted him to stop looking at me like I am already dead. I said and he knew I am in a bad state but not dying yet so fight for me. My daughter was petrified and often emotionally running away from me. It so hard for a family. Support him and look for support from Macmillan nurses. Not even coucelling often know how to help if not experienced. Macmillan might point a direction where to go for help. It is good you look for help. I send my huge supportive hug to you in this difficult time. Love

Thanks for your reply Christine 53, I'm sure he does need some sort of counselling, he's obviously hurting but he's been like this since before my daughters  brain tumour was discovered and we all naturally assumed he'd step up and support her. He's due home tomorrow, he works away which suits him, I'm not expecting miracles but if he gave her a hug now and then and some gentle words would help. 

Thankyou for taking the time to reply, much appreciated. 

Morag x

Thanks for your reply Tiga and you may be right, he is completely lost and can't  or won't face up to what is going on. Today's another day, and it's just comforting to know that she's not the only one out there who feels alone at times. 

Sending love and light. 

Morag x

Morag. It is overwhelming to go through and most terrifying is that you dont know how your body will cope. Set up some simple plan for every day little steps and long term if possible too. Simplify cooking and other things. Give each other more cuddles and laughs. Add some value to what is going on to balance it. Each other is all you got. Milion hugs. Always here for you