Hi all,
My LD partners young sister is currently in hospice with neuroblastoma, they are all at the hospice including her ex (the young girl doesn't know they are separated and he has been a big part of her life including raising money for her treatments) as I have not met the family personally yet it does not feel appropriate for me to be there as well although I fight the urge to drive the 3 hours to be near by daily to be close to her and see her.
This is truly a horrendous time for them all, my heart weeps for them and while I know none of this is about me, I am struggling to support my partner who I love dearly, she has gone from texting, video calling and calling me to nothing over the last few days and I believe its because her capacity right now is just for her family and her sons (who are with relatives while they are far away with her sister). She even said she 'Cant do this right now' but didn't say what 'this' was even after I asked.
I am struggling to cope with how to support her, her grief is something I cannot even begin to understand nor can I fix this in any way but I see her pain in how she is with me, someone said to me that we are often harshest to the ones we care the most for, she has been snappy with me, short and now is completely ignoring me, I know this is the grief and potentially me being too pushy with communication.
What can I do to support her? the last message I sent was 'Don't need to respond but I am thinking of you all, here if you want to talk or have someone listen or if you want space that's okay too' she has been online but has ignored my messages all day.
Do i leave her alone now until she makes contact or do I keep checking in? could this be the end of our relationship? do I keep reaching out for the next few weeks and months and how often?
I am so lost right now. Cancer is so awful. Any advice is appreciated.
