Scared!

Hi and welcome to the community at what we know must be a difficult and scary time for you. Going in to the unknown world of chemo can be very scary and made worse by all the stories you hear. Some people sail through treatment while others have a tough time of it. Mostly, people are somewhere in the middle. The common side effect of most treatments is the tiredness, so it's good to have someone to help you with general things. I see you have found the Breast Group. If you start a new discussion in the group, you will find others going through the same as you and will offer help and support. There is also an ongoing thread you may like to look at and join in on, September Chemo Club . It is a long thread and I have linked you to the most recent page. It is for people going through chemo to have a general chat and share what they are going through. Any problems navigating the site, then shout out. Best wishes.

Thanks Rily, I think it is the entering into the unknown and an accumulation of emotions. I'll have a look at those pages.Thank you.

Hi ya! When you look through the page/ thread mentioned above please bear in mind that those posting are those who get side effects, there are many of us who can’t compete and are just getting on with life!

It’s not definite that’s you'll get all or even some side effects all the time! I’ve done ec very easily and  am now on docetaxel which is harder, more mentally than physically for me which is difficult to get people to talk about for some reason.

Please drop me a message if you feel the need. Good luck, I’m sure you’ll be fine xxx

I'm about to start chemo for prostrate cancer which has spread to ribs, my daughter has significant mental health issue. I struggle with her (who is 23) more than my other two who are younger. I feel there are some things I can protect them from and others which I cannot hide (hair loss). Up until now surgery was six weeks I couldn't hide, chemo I can't hide my 23 at times is like a 4 year old nothing is right, whatever you decide is right for you tell them what is right for you. Don't feel guilty it's your decision your trying your best making decisions considering them (right or wrongly) your motivation is  correct. 

John

Hi John,

It's so hard for your children no matter what age. My daughter is 31 and lives alone 300 miles from me. She's so stressed she's lost her job through this and needs medication. She's constantly guilty that she's so far away and wants to be helping more. No matter how I reassure her this doesn't go away. I'm on chemo now so she comes for periods of a week or so to support me but travel is so expensive. I need to let her look after me at times so she feels she is doing something positive. I try to be very upbeat around her and go out for tea but it's hard not to show weakness and be brave all the time. Sometimes I just go to bed and say I need to sleep even if I don't just so we can both have a break. She's not well herself either which makes it harder. It comes down to the fact that you know your own children best and you will always make decisions that are best for them if you listen to their concerns and they then know that you understand what is in their hearts and minds and can ask you questions. Not knowing what is happening is very stressful for them and while you don't want to overburden them with too much information, they need to know enough to come to terms with this horrible condition and their own situation. Good luck John. 

Babs

Hi Ruthie 2,

I started chemo this week. On day 4. Had FEC. Had steroids, anti sickness and started home injections for white blood cells. All well so far apart from feeling drunk at times. Waiting for side effects to kick in and wondering when it's going to happen. The unknown is scary. Any advice?

Babs x