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What to do for the best ?

Posted by

Hello all,

my 94 year old dad was just diagnosed with oesophageal cancer after falling ill a few weeks ago. It took about 4 weeks of him being in hospital really poorly before diagnosis was made and the decision to fit a stent as a palliative measure. The week after he made leaps and bounds and he came home at the beginning of this week, he lives alone and before this he was very active took care of himself and was mentally sharp . The hospital has assessed him and said he doesn't have care needs as such as he was above baseline for needing anything so a lady comes at night to make sure he has his tea. Now he's come home and he's well compared to in hospital we've all kind of rallied  round to look after him , I go every day and my sister has took time off to go , but he seems quite confused and doesn't want to leave the house , we can't be there 24 / 7 long term and he's reluctant to have care workers in but we are worried he won't eat or take his tablets properly , given the hospital have said he's capable of looking after himself should we back off a bit and hope he does for himself as he's always done he says he can't think at the minute but is that because we are overcrowding him and not giving him the time and peace ha perhaps needs to get in a routine again it's hard to back off a bit cos we are worried , I just don't know what to do for the best , I feel better just writing this down but any advice or shared experience is appreciated

Needing friends
Posted by

Hi there, I think that things may improve for your dad in a couple of days, but if it doesn't, then I feel he may need to be reassessed. Things can change in a matter of days, so the hospit alassassment may not now be relavent. Hope things get sorted, thinking of you, pam xx